So Wrong (the collected pornographica of Elsie)

With the divorce final, I went to work hard on settling into middle age. I quit running. I took up smoking, quickly discovered that I hated it, and took up pot instead. I started golfing, hated it, and started running again. I tried dating, really hated that, and focused on masturbation instead. Facebook started pushing erectile dysfunction ads at me. In short, life slouched along.

My next door neighbor was hot. Smoking hot, as in she could be a yoga model hot. She was skinny and wholesome looking in a granola-dykey sort of way.  She always had a mischievous little elfish smile on her face when we passed in the stairwell. We lived opposite each other on the top floor of a five-floor walkup. Her name was Sheila, and she was very gay, worked in the low end of finance, and every now and then we would sit around on the front steps and get high together.

We were sitting on the stoop getting high together one lazy hot and humid afternoon. Our beer cans were ice cold and sweating, we were surrounded by a thick cloud of fragrant greenish smoke, and I was thinking Sheila looking mighty fine in her cut off shorts and sports bra, and I was contemplating making a pass at her, lesbian or not, when she dropped this bomb on me:

“This girl I’m banging right now, she’s never had an orgasm.”

The coughing fit that ensued may or may not have been me aspirating on my beer.

“Never?!”

Sheila took a big hit off the joint and held it in. “Apparently not. She says she’s gotten really close before with masturbation, but never quite able to push herself over the edge.

She let out a big puff of smoke.

“I think it’s a mental block. I want to push her past that edge.”

That night their sex noises permeated my apartment, spilling across the hall, through the door and walls, keeping me up until late. Not that I was complaining. Jerk-off material for weeks!

And, they certainly weren’t shy about it. The smacking, panting, groaning, and occasional screaming became a regular feature of my evenings, two or three times a week; Friday and Saturday, and sometimes Wednesday nights. Every now and then they would fuck on Sunday mornings too. I got to recognize Sheila’s orgasm. But I never did hear her partner come.

I got into the habit of masturbating along with them.

My dick was firmly in hand on Saturday night when the sex noises abruptly stopped, and a few moments later a soft but insistent knock on my apartment door. I wrapped a towel around my waist and opened the door, and of course it was Sheila.

She was pink and flushed and out of breath, covered in a sheen of sweat. She wore nothing but a black sports bra, and a bright orange strap-on that was big, but not quite so large as to be absolutely terrifying.

“Come over here,” Sheila said with an air of urgency, “I think I’ve got her close!”

The girl was tied to Sheila’s kitchen table. She was round and soft where Sheila was thin and angular. Her skin was the color of milk chocolate. Her breasts were large, spilling across her chest like a pair of oversized pancakes, with enormous dark brown aureolae and erect nipples. Her cunt was shaved bare, spread wipe open with labia purple and engorged, literally dripping wetness. Her clit was exposed, a fat pink pearl.

“Feed her your dick,” Sheila commanded me, “Fuck her mouth while I do her cunt! Hurry!”

The girl (her name, I would find out later, was Mahogany) nodded eagerly, opening her mouth wide for my erect cock.

I’m embarrassed to tell you how long it had been since a woman had given me oral. Suffice it to say that I was married for 20 years, and my wife did not suck cock. Mahogany went after my penis like she was intent on winning a championship hotdog eating contest. Her mouth slurped with enthusiastic gusto, devouring me so that I almost lost it right away.

Sheila pressed a button somewhere, and her safety-orange dildo started buzzing like a nest full of angry hornets. She positioned herself between Mahogany’s splayed legs, and started fucking her pussy, hard. She grunted with effort every time she thrust the dildo in. Mahogany gurgled on my cock.

“Grab her hair,” Sheila panted at me, “Fuck her mouth. Come down her throat.” Mahogany moaned around my cock.

Sheila was fucking Mahogany with all her might, slamming the dildo deep inside, and then grinding herself against her clit. She reached down and pinched Mahogany’s big brown nipples, pulling and twisting them cruelly as I fucked her face.

Soon I was feeling myself slipping past the point of no return. I heard the familiar sounds of Sheila’s orgasm, and I let myself go, burying my cock all the way into Mahogany’s mouth, forgetting for a moment to care whether she could breathe or not, exploding, pumping gob after gob of semen into her gullet.

When we were all disentangled and untied, halfway dressed and drinking cokes on Sheila’s couch, Mahogany said, “Wow guys, that was really amazing!”

“Did you come?” Sheila asked.

“No, but I was soooo close…”

***

The next Saturday Sheila invited me over. We all ate Thai take-out, and then I watched while the girls made out on the bed. I was treated to my first sight of Sheila really naked: petite breasts, flat tummy, furry black-haired pussy. She had an absolutely gorgeous ass. Watching her lick Mahogany’s smooth brown pussy was truly the most beautiful thing I had ever witnessed.

I took it upon myself to feed her my dick, more rubbing over her full lips and outstretched tongue than jamming it down her throat this time. Mahogony moaned and squirmed while Sheila licked her clit and fingered her pussy, but predictably she couldn’t quite get over the edge.

Finally, Sheila came up for air. “Fuck her,” she instructed me. “Fuck her fucking brains out!”

I was happy to comply. Her pussy was hot and wet and slick, and fit my dick like a glove. Sheila straddled Mahogany’s face and held a bullet vibe to her clit while I fucked her. I could feel the vibrations all the way inside her pussy, and the muffled moans Mahogany was making between Sheila’s pale thighs became louder and more insistent.

Sheila and I managed to come at the same time, her growling like a tigress and mashing her pussy into Mahogany’s face, me shouting out loud and filling her pussy to overflowing with my semen. We even kissed a little bit during the aftershocks, until we both kind of realized what we were doing and broke off in embarrassment.

Mahogany curled up in a sweaty, come-soaked fetal ball on the bed, clutching her clit. “Sooooo close!” she lamented.

***

Next time, I entered the apartment to find Mahogany already naked, wrists lashed securely to Sheila’s headboard. Her legs were extended straight up in the air, toes pointed at the ceiling, and her brown butt cheeks were red from where Sheila had been working them over with a ping pong paddle.

“You’re just in time,” Sheila smirked as I hurriedly undressed. “We are going to make this bitch come tonight, come hell or high water.”

She grinned at my erection, which popped eagerly out of my boxers.

“Why don’t you start by licking her pussy?” Sheila suggested, “While I eat out her asshole.”

I dove into Mahogany’s extremely wet pussy, concentrating on licking and sucking her engorged clit. Next to me, Sheila got her face deep in between Mahogany’s tenderized ass cheeks and started licking and slurping. She surprised me by wrapping a hand around my cock while she rimmed.

Mahogany moaned and squirmed and told us how fucking good it felt and how close she was and begged us not to stop, but of course it didn’t go anywhere. Just as my jaw was starting to cramp up, Sheila came up for air.

“Ok,” she said, “Commence phase two.”

From a drawer in the bedside table, Sheila produced a rather sizeable glass butt plug, which she slathered with lube, and unceremoniously jammed up Mahogany’s ass. Mahogany grunted as the toy sank to the hilt.

“Now fuck her,” Sheila told me, “And I’ll lick her clit.”

I propped Mahogany’s legs up on my shoulders and entered her pussy. She was extra tight, and I could feel the bulky shape of the plug in her asshole through the walls of her vagina. Sheila lay flat on the bed, head resting on Mahogany’s soft tummy, pulled back her fat labia, and licked her pink clit while my cock slid in and out of her sopping wet pussy. I really wanted her to spare my dick a lick or two, but I wasn’t about to push my luck. Also, I was having a really hard time not shooting off in Mahogany’s tight wet pussy.

Mahogany’s cries increased in volume and pitch, but for all our combined efforts, she couldn’t quite get there. Her face was screwed up in concentration, her eyes screwed tight shut.

We were all three panting with exertion.

Sheila pulled the plug out of Mahogany with a satisfying ‘pop’. “Fuck her up the ass”, Sheila instructed. “She should be nice and loose by now.”

She dribbled cool lube all over my cock, which was already liberally coated in Mahogany’s pussy juices, and was achingly hard and swollen. I nudged the head against Mahohany’s anus, which opened right up for me. As gently as I could, I slid my erection all the way up her ass. She groaned out loud “So good, so fucking good!”

“Fuck her ass hard, fuck her deep,” Sheila told me, handing me a little bullet vibe to stimulate her clit with.

I pressed the vibrating bullet against her engorged clit, and plunged my dick in and out of her tight asshole. She was wailing beneath me, her anus gripping me tight. It took everything I had not to shoot off right away, but I wanted to feel her get off. I clenched my toes and shut my eyes tight and kept on fucking her.

Mahogany’s keening suddenly stopped.

I opened my eyes and saw Sheila on the bed in front of me. One hand had a fistful of Mahogany’s curly black hair. In her other hand she grasped an enormous chef’s knife. The steel gleamed cold under the LED Christmas lights that were strung across the bedroom ceiling.

“Keep on fucking her ass!” Sheila hissed at me. And then loud enough for the whole block to hear: “I’M SICK AND TIRED OF THIS STUPID NIGGER CUNT! COME ON BITCH, COME OR DIE!”

She pressed the point of the blade against Mahogany’s neck, and a tiny drop of blood appear. I felt her anus clench hard on my cock, and her body froze in silent terror.

“YOU CHOOSE CUNT! COME OR DIE? COME OR DIE? COME OR DIE?” The tiny drop of blood became a trickle, running down her neck onto the sheets.

Mahogany thrashed and kicked, impaled on my dick, the half-forgotten bullet vibe still buzzing away. Her wrists were tightly bound, and Sheila gripped her hair with white knuckles. I could see the veins in her neck pulsing, a millimeter away from the cutting edge of Sheila’s Henkel.

“Help!” she screamed. “Help fuck oh Shit, I’m coming! Oh fuck, I’m coming, I’m coming!!” Her words devolved into incoherent wailing as her body shook. Her anus clenched and relaxed and clenched again, and a stream of (come? piss?) squirted out of her cunt, catching me full on the chest.

I unloaded in Mahogany’s ass as she thrashed, eyes shut tight, weeping and choking. My own orgasm was so intense, a mixture of wild endorphins and pent-up desire, that I think I blacked out for a moment.

My slick, soft dick slipped anticlimactically out of Mahogany’s anus. Sheila had left the room, and Mahogany was still weeping silently, eyes shut, the nick on her neck already scabbing over, a viscous mix of semen and lube leaking out of her ass.

I slunk out of the bedroom and across the hall, locking and bolting the door behind me. I went to bed, but couldn’t sleep for a long time.

***

Monday afternoon, and it was threatening to rain. Sheila and I sat on the stoop, getting high after work.

“I wasn’t really going to kill her, you know that, right?”

“I know,” I said, and passed her the joint.

END