So Wrong (the collected pornographica of Elsie)

11

You go over to Lara, who is a year ahead of you, two years older than you, and more than a little bit intimidating. She gives you a little half-smile which is impossible to read, but she doesn’t tell you to go away, so you sit down next to her.

“Have you finished writing your midterm paper for Sullivan’s class yet?” you ask.

“Naw,” she yawns, “I never do anything before the last minute. Besides, I’m pretty sure Sullivan doesn’t bother reading papers: he just scans them for key words and phrases and grades by word count. Have you read his book? The man is kind of a douche.”

You have read his book, and you largely agree with Lara’s assessment. “Did you really sleep with him?” you blurt out, and immediately regret it.

Lara rolls her eyes and takes a big swallow from her beer. “Sheesh, you screw one lousy professor, and you get yourself a reputation. I fuck whoever I want, whenever I want, and I don’t make any apologies for it. And I get good grades because I’m smart, and because I work hard.”

That isn’t actually entirely true; Lara is the queen of turning work in late and missing labs; but she is smart, there is no doubt about that, so point taken.

“Hey,” she says, setting her empty beer bottle on the floor, “You wanna see something funny? Follow me out back.”

Without waiting to see if you are going to follow, she gets up and heads for the back door. You watch her ass wiggle as she walks, soft and jiggly in those loose, faded blue jeans. There is a lot of surface area. For the first time, you realize why she gets so much male attention: it’s not because she has a swimsuit-model’s figure, she doesn’t. It’s the attitude.

Do you:

Follow Lara, her wiggly butt and her big fat attitude, out back? *Go to 2

Ditch this nonsense and go back to your dorm, where you have a fancy new vibrator, fresh double-As, and a paper to write? *Go to 21

12

You follow the Delmsey twins up the stairs to the second-floor game room, an oversized closet with a carpeted floor and an X-Box, a Playstation, a Wii, and a tricked-out PC. Just as the three of you come up the stairs, the game room door opens and Sacchidananda and Paul make their exit, hand in hand, looking sweaty and rumpled. Fay and Ray exchange looks and giggles; Sacchidananda flashes you a shy and self-satisfied little smile. She has really nice boobs, you realize You’d never really noticed before.

Into the tiny room, and close the door behind. You stand in the corner while Fay and Ray curl up on the beanbag together, touching and kissing like a pair of lovers. Which, you realize with a sudden start, is exactly what they are.

The pink jumpsuits are shed like snake skins. Underneath, they are wearing matching grey undershirts and briefs. You had them backwards: the one you thought was Fay is actually Ray, and there is a prominent bulge threatening to bust out of the front of his tight underwear.

The twins are locked together, grappling like a pair of wrestlers, mouths mashed together, limbs intertwined and roving. Underclothes come off almost violently.

They are both skinny beings, with long narrow necks and hollow chests. The ribs are visible under taut skin so pale that you can almost see their internal organs. They both have wild fluffs of blonde hair under their armpits and between their legs. Fay has very small breasts with pink, puffy nipples that stick out eagerly. Her pussy bulges out hungrily between her svelte thighs. Ray has a six-pack abdomen, though that is more due to an absence of body fat than an excess of muscle tone. His erect cock is huge, bordering on ridiculously big; the shaft has a 90 degree twist that skews the purple, bulbous, nectarine-sized head sideways. His furry balls are compact and drawn up close to his body. You wonder if he is going to fuck his sister with that outsized cock. You wonder if it would actually fit inside her.

As far as you can tell, they are now completely oblivious to your presence. Your hand finds it’s way up your skirt, down your panties, slowly petting your pussy, which has become extremely wet and slippery. Your clit feels distended, swollen in an obnoxiously delightful way.

They quickly reconfigure themselves into a ‘69’ position. Ray is on the bottom, his cock pointing up like some freaky albino totem pole. Fay is on top, her legs spread wide, her butt thrust up, her blossoming pussy poised just above Ray’s waiting face. She pauses, looks up, gives you one long, solemn, unreadable, look, and then she dives in.

Ray is slurping at her vagina with a vigor that is impressive. His face is crushed into her muff; he grips a pale ass cheek in each hand; you can hear the wet sounds of him licking and slurping at her like a cybernetic pussy-licking machine. How he can breathe while he does that is beyond you, but he keeps his face buried in her wet cunt, and she is clearly enjoying the ride, wiggling back at him, bucking up and down and writhing back and forth.

Even after she peaks, coming in a silent, rigid, almost reptilian rapture, he doesn’t stop, though he does slow the pace down a little. Now it is Fay’s turn to concentrate on pleasuring him.

She doesn’t take his cock in her mouth: it fairly obviously wouldn’t fit. Instead she licks it like a giant popsicle, tracing her tongue along the bulging vein that runs up the underside, following the twisted architecture of his cock all the way to the gasping pee hole. She kisses the head, lavishes her tongue all around, tracing every ridge, then retreats back down the shaft, nuzzling his ball sac and below, down between his muscular, tight cheeks.

Fay glances up, half-smiles at you almost shyly. Your own finger is knuckle deep in your hot, slick cunt. She takes one long, bony index finger, licks it seductively, and then slides it straight up Ray’s asshole.

She finger fucks him with one hand and jerks him off with the other, his fat ripe cock head balanced on her waiting tongue. You can hear his moans change in pitch and timbre, slightly muffled as his face is still pressed hard into his sister’s pussy. Suddenly, he disengages from her, arching his back and throwing his head backward, his face a rigid mask of ecstasy.

You slide down the wall into a sitting position, your legs spreading naturally apart. Your red-and-green striped panties dangle from one ankle. The twins watch silently, owlish, hand-in-hand, as you masturbate for them, plunging your fingers hard and deep up your pussy until you can stand it no longer, and then abandoning all restraint and rubbing your aching clit fast, fast, faster, until you come, gasping and sobbing. It is one of the strongest orgasms you have ever experienced.

“That was nice,” says Ray.

“That was nice,” confirms Fay, squeezing his hand and giving her brother a fond look. Pearly white semen is still leaking out of Ray’s much diminished cock. “We should do that again sometime. We should let her watch us fuck.”

“Yeah” Ray says, “We should. But right now we should get back to the studio. We’ve got a paper to write.”

Almost in a daze, through a fog of endorphins, you watch the twins get dress and leave. You shake your head and pull up your panties. Your pussy is still wet, your clit is pleasantly tender. You also have a paper to write.

END

13

“Why don’t we find somewhere a little more private?” you say, eyeing his athlete’s body hungrily. Blue jeans and a white button-down shirt. They’d look nice in a crumpled heap on your floor. “Like my dorm?”

“Ah, I’m not sure that would be such a great idea,” Mike says, “I’ve got a girlfriend back home in Oshkosh, and we’re trying to stay monogamous.”

“But you’re allowed to eat pussy?” you say skeptically.

“Yeah, as long as I tell her all about it. We have phone sex and play on webcam together. I can pretty much do whatever I want, but she’s the only one who’s allowed to touch my dick.” He smiles sheepishly. It’s a cute look for him. “Come on,” he says, “we can find somewhere more private here in the house if you want.”

You try the upstairs game room, an oversized closet with a carpeted floor and an X-Box, a Playstation, a Wii, and a tricked-out PC; but it is already spoken for: Sacchidananda and Paul are naked on a bean bag on the floor, a twisted, sweaty confusion of brown and pale appendages. You should have realized, but had never really comprehended, that she had such big boobs. Really nice big boobs.

So you end up locked in the upstairs bathroom. Fortunately (and surprisingly as Schrödinger’s Cat House is populated almost entirely by male undergrad physics majors) the bathroom is clean.

“Are you allowed to kiss girls?” you ask, pressing yourself up against him. His cock is sticking out the front of his jeans like a uranium fuel rod.

“Not really, but I’ll make an exception.” Mike pulls you to him, kissing your lips hard, grinding his crotch against you, squeezing your butt. You kiss him back, grinding right back against his hardness.

You step back, pulling your grey cami off over your head, exposing your breasts. “Didn’t you say something earlier about eating me out?”

Mike puts his huge, meaty hands under your armpits and with no effort whatsoever, lifts you up and sets you down on the sink. Your legs spread apart and your skirt rides up. He grins fiendishly, and kneels down, sticking his head between your thighs. You can feel his hot breath on your pussy through your panties; his stubble tickles your bare flesh. You lean back, resting your shoulders against the mirror, and idly run your fingers through his close-cropped brown hair.

He tugs, you skootch up your butt, and your panties are off, lying in a green-and-red striped little heap on the tile floor. Your pussy is open and drooling, and he proceeds to torment you, sweet torture, barely touching you with the tip of his tongue, traversing up and down and back up again, flirting with, but not actually touching, your swollen clitoris.

Finally, he relents, dragging the flat of his tongue up your sopping-wet pussy, spreading your lips, burrowing up inside you. Your clit feels like a carbon-oxygen white dwarf star about to collapse into supernova. You rock forward, offering yourself up to him, pressing your overheated cunt against his face. He responds eagerly, licking faster and more aggressively.

Now your fingers are curled up in his hair, struggling for purchase, trying to pull him in harder. Your legs are kicking over his broad shoulders, your toes are flexing and curling involuntarily. He is concentrating on your clit, flicking it with his tongue like a baby cat greedily lapping up milk, one big finger is pressed up against your asshole, and his thumb is invading the entrance to your pussy, and you are coming, coming hard, all over his face, and you could give two shits if the whole house hears about it. The orgasm is so intense, if it weren’t for his strong hands, you would be shaken off your perch on the sink. You back arches, and your body shudders again and again, as waves of pleasure wash over you, spasming your cunt and making your clit twitch delightfully. Your nipples are hard and pink, your chest is flushed, and your breath comes in gasps.

He stands up, smiling, pleased with himself. Your wetness glistens on his lips, chin, and nose. He unbuttons his jeans, lets them slide down before stepping out of them. His erection is bulging out of his tight-whities. He gives you another grin, cocky almost, and pulls his underwear off. His cock springs out, quiveringly hard and pink, drooling clear, sticky pre-come like a leaky faucet.

“I’m not allowed to touch your dick, right?”

“That’s right.” He grasps his cock in one hand, pointing it at you like a gun, stroking himself pensively.

You get up off the sink and maneuver yourself behind him. You are both reflected in the mirror in front of you. His cock is standing rigidly up; it isn’t the biggest one ever, but it does look delicious. He is still wearing his white button-down shirt. You put an arm around his broad chest and press your still-wet pussy against the back of his thigh as he slowly jerks off.

If you move your hips just so, you can stimulate your clit against the back of his muscular leg. You let one finger explore down the base of his spine, down into the cleft between his buttocks. His ass is strong and taught. When your fingertip finds his anus, he groans softly, masturbating faster, pressing himself back against you.

You withdraw, bringing your finger to your pussy, which is once again wet as an over-ripe peach. You slide your finger up inside, getting it nice and slippery, then return to his butt crack.

Your finger invades him. He is moaning out loud now. His asshole is tight, hot. Your finger is buried up inside him, fucking him from behind. He is jerking off now like he means it, lost in ecstasy, his balls jiggling, his ass humping back against you, and you are riding his leg, slick with your juices, approaching a second orgasm of your own.

He comes with a shout, pumping and pumping and not stopping, his pearly-white come splattering onto the mirror. His asshole spasms, squeezing your finger tight, impossibly tight. His orgasm sets you off and you ride the back of his leg blissfully as he milks the last drops of thick, viscous semen from his wilting cock.

“Is your girlfriend going to hear all about this?” You ask as you pull up your cami and retrieve your panties.

“Every single juicy detail” he says, “Thank you for everything.”

You shake hands, an oddly formal gesture, and then part ways. You head back to the dorms, where your midterm paper awaits, stubbornly unwritten.

END

14

Oh no! You have walked into the slavering fangs of a lurking grue!

You have died.

*Go to 1

15

They aren’t down in the basement, where the Axis and Allies game is in full swing. The Martians, to no-one’s surprise, have been dominating World War II, but now the Vikings, allied with the Comanche, are making a surprise comeback. This will probably go on until dawn and beyond.

They are not in the kitchen, though Lara Cunningham and Professor Sullivan are busy leaning against the refrigerator, kissing deeply and touching each other through their clothes. He has a handful of her curly flame-red hair, and his cock is clearly visibly through his corduroy trousers. It looks long, long and erect.

You go upstairs, where there is an oversized closet that has been converted to a game room with a carpeted floor and an X-Box, a Playstation, a Wii, and a tricked-out PC. The door is closed.

You may have heard a noise behind the door, a muffled, sort of furtive noise, but you aren’t sure

Do you:

Tap lightly on the door? *Go to 22

Mind your own business and go back downstairs? *Go to 8

Stand there, paralyzed by indecision? *Go to 19

16

There is no 16

*Go to 1

17

The stars are indeed brilliant overhead, a hundred thousand twinkling alien suns, austere and distant. The grass in the back yard is calf-high; the number heads who live at Schrödinger’s Cat House have more important things on their minds than yard work: namely converting Axis and Allies over to steampunk time-travel rules, with Martian invaders.

Professor Sullivan leans up against a tree and smokes a cigarette, an unfiltered Pall Mall. You lean up against him. He feels warm and scratchy and comfortable, like an antique teddy bear. When he finishes his smoke, he leans down, and almost casually puts his arm around you. He kisses you on the lips. He tastes of cigarette smoke and whiskey, a combination that is not completely unpleasant.

You kiss him back, pressing up against his lanky body. You can feel his erection through his corduroy pants and with a secret thrill like stepping off a high diving board, you press yourself harder against him, dragging your hand up and down his cock through the coarse ribbed fabric.

You sink to your knees in the lush, dewy grass, carefully extracting his professorial penis from his pants. It stands at rigid attention, glistening softly in the dim starlight.

His cock is long and thin, reminiscent of some weird night snake. He is uncircumcised, and the globular head is half-hidden under a hood of chamois-soft flesh.

It has been forever, eons, epochs, since you have sucked a cock. You peel back his foreskin, revealing his pink, straining glans, and he grunts slightly. You pop the head of his cock into your mouth like a big, sweet piece of candy, savoring the taste and the texture, lolling your tongue over and over it as if you are trying to lick your way through the hard outer shell to get at the sweet stuff inside.

Professor Sullivan groans out loud, a noise that thrills you. He starts softly humping your face, and you open your mouth wide to accept his cock. His pubes are crinkly and scratchy. His pendulous balls are pressed up against your lips, and he is all the way inside your mouth, almost but not quite making you gag; your panties are soaked; you are eating him alive.

He fucks your face, slowly, deeply, reaching down the front of your cami and cupping your breasts.

Abruptly, he stops, yanking his saliva-coated cock from your wide-open mouth.

“I want to fuck you,” he says.

No arguments there! While he awkwardly divests himself of his trousers and underpants, you fish an emergency spare condom out of your jacket pocket.

He looks crestfallen. “Do we have to use that thing?” he asks.

Do you:

Insist that he uses the condom? *Go to 3

Throw caution to the wind and continue unprotected? *Go to 4

18

It is very dark. You are likely to be eaten by a grue.

*Go to 1

19

Maybe you heard something and maybe you didn’t. You stand at the top of the stairs, hesitating, feeling awkward and gawky. What you should be doing right now is working on your mid-term paper; what you would like to be doing right now is getting some action.

The door swings open, and Sacchidananda and Paul come out of the gaming closet, arm in arm, smiling goofily and looking sweaty and self-satisfied.

Sacchidananda has pleasantly curvy wide hips and big boobs. You never noticed before just how large her breasts were, but they are big and nice and bouncy, and appear to be unconstrained by any bra underneath her flimsy t-shirt. Paul is a tall, skinny fellow. There is a large wet spot on the front of his khakis. You can almost smell the sex wafting off them.

You have the strongest feeling that you just missed out on an exciting and erotic adventure. You feel crestfallen and lonely and frustratingly horny as they excuse themselves past you and down the stairs.

What you should really do is go home and work on that big mid-term paper.

Do you:

Go back to the dorm to work on your paper? *Go to21

Go back downstairs and try to find someone else to hang out with? *Go to 8

20

You nod your assent, too turned on just at the moment to trust your voice. It has been epochs, absolutely eons, since anyone but you has touched your pussy. When was the last time someone licked you there? When was the last time someone licked your pussy and meant it? You quickly trade places with Mike: you are slouching in the ratty easy chair, he is on his hands and knees in front of you.

A quick look around confirms it: nobody is looking. You hike up your skirt, and with one quick move, you yank your panties off. Your pussy is naked and wet. You wad up your damp-crotched green-and-red-striped panties and cram them into your jacket pocket.

Oh, and he is good too! You can feel his breath on your oozing pussy. Your clit trembles with anticipation. His stubble scratches on your inner thigh. You raise your knees up toward your chest, pointing your toes at the ceiling. The tip of his tongue traces your slit, meandering up and down, tormenting your aching clit. You groan and rock your hips forward, urging him on, but he takes his sweet, sweet time.

You can feel his tongue invading your pussy, probing its way up between your swollen lips. It dances down between your butt cheeks, probing the dark secret area approaching your anus, then darts upward again. Finally, at long last, he finds your clit, fluttering like a monarch butterfly migrating home. He licks you playfully, unrelentingly, bringing you to the very edge. Your clit feels like a white dwarf about to go supernova. You are making noises, squirming in the chair, trying to get more of his tongue onto your pulsating, hyper-excited clitoris. He keeps pulling back at the critical moment, and it is driving you insane.

Just when you really, seriously can’t take any more, when you are ready to cry out with frustration, push him aside and finish it yourself, he takes the plunge. Thick fingers invade your pussy. A long, slippery finger slides up your asshole. The flat of his tongue presses hard against your aching clit and squirms.

You come hard and long and loud, like a swiftly bursting summer thunderstorm, rolling thunder that goes on and on. Your legs kick wildly in the air, your head lolls from side to side. It feels like it’s never going to stop.

At last it does stop, fitfully, with jolting aftershocks. Mike comes up for air, grinning widely, your wetness slick on his face. You are gasping for breath.

You look around. Lara and Professor Sullivan are no longer in the couch; they have apparently migrated somewhere more private. The noise of the modified Axis and Allies game still filters up from downstairs. The Delmsey twins have put down their game of Cat’s Cradle, and are staring at you, silent and wide-eyed.

“Thank you!” you manage at last.

“My pleasure.” Mike says, and he means it.

“Would you like to fuck me now?” you ask, “Or should I just go down on you?”

As far as you can tell, the Delmsey twins haven’t even blinked. They are staring like a pair of weird, pale owls.

Mike blushes. He actually blushes. “Um,” he says, “I can’t. I have a girl back home in Oshkosh, and we’re trying to stay monogamous. We have phone sex and do webcams. It’s hard, but so far it’s working out. So no thanks. But do you mind if I masturbate?”

You don’t mind, no not at all.

You pull your cami down around your middle so he can come on your tits if he likes, and he does seem to like. He quickly unbuttons his jeans, fishing out his hard, red-hot, juicy-looking cock. It isn’t the biggest dick you’ve ever seen, but that is more than ok,  and it is beautiful. You catch tantalizing glimpses of his football-player body, hard, toned abs, veiny muscular thighs, and you wish you could see more.

You encourage him softly, playing with your nipples and leaning in for a better view as he jerks off. The head of his dick is swollen like an over-ripe nectarine, leaking clear, sticky pre-come. You can feel the Delmsey twins staring, and you let one finger wander up your skirt, idly stroking your still-wet pussy as he pumps himself faster and faster.

His breathing changes, becoming faster and raspier. He is rocking back and forth, clenching his buttocks. His forehead is wrinkled, his eyes are half-lidded, his entire being is focused on coming.

At last, with a drawn-out, chocking gasp, he comes. The semen shoots out of his cock with amazing force, splashing onto your breasts in big hot sticky white puddles. His cock trembles again and again as he continues stroking, slower now, lost in pleasure. You spread his come around your boobs, sampling his salty-bittersweet taste.

Finally he is done. His penis is soft, one last big fat drop of semen hovers on the very tip as he tucks his cock away and buttons up his pants. You wish you could have licked him clean, but that is not to be, not tonight.

He smiles sheepishly and thanks you as you use your wadded-up panties to swab your chest clean. You like the way his come smells on you. The Delmsey twins have gone back to their game of Cat’s Cradle.

You pull up your cami, straighten out your skirt, and thank Mike one more time. He smiles and shakes your hand, an almost painfully fetching mixture of confidence and shyness. You wonder what that cock of his would feel like to hold in your hand, to have in your mouth, sliding up your wet pussy or gently invading your asshole. You guess you’ll probably never find out.

You put on your jacket, with the messy, stuck-together, crumpled panties in the pocket, and head out into the cool night air for the half-mile trek back to your dorm. You do, after all, have a paper to write.

END