Posts Tagged sex

The Ten Thousand Things

It is far too early on a Saturday morning, and outside my apartment, the Peaceable City slumbers silently. The empty streets are a still life, a daguerreotype, an idealized architectural sketch, and it is shaping up to be another grey and rainy day. I am going to be hung over. I can tell already: the buzz behind my ears rings threateningly, an angry hive, an unrelenting alarm clock. I want a cigarette, badly, though I haven’t smoked since my senior year of high school. Not tobacco, anyway.

I don’t feel like masturbating, no not at all. I feel like going back to sleep and staying that way, but my body insists, and I am nothing if not a slave to the flesh.

So I roll over, unsnap my rig, and slide out of my harness. Ever since college, I’ve slept wearing my strap-on. It’s sort of like a phallic security blanket.

I let my hand slide inside my boxer shorts, past my scruffy patch and down in between my labia, where my liege and master, that impatient little nubbin Mistress Clitoris lies waiting for my undivided attention.

It isn’t happening. The requisite wetness simply isn’t there. I get up, pee, and swallow a mouthful of water. Then I climb back into bed.

I pull off my boxer shorts and my red t-shirt, and sprawl across the crumpled sheets. My mouth feels like the factory floor of an asbestos plant. Never drink and wallow at the same time: it always leads to disaster.

I close my eyes, and think about one of the first times Jeremy and I were together. Not the very first time. Like most first times that was an awkward experience; rushed, clumsy, hot as a flash fire, sexually unremarkable, and rather blurry in my memory.

This was the second or third time, and though I’m by no means a prude, I’m a little embarrassed to say just how early on in the relationship this was. I think it was our second ‘official’ date, and I think we ditched the ‘date’ part. Such is life.

I was packing, and I wasn’t at all sure how Jeremy would react. We’d been making out in his open front doorway, halfway into the hall, and I could feel his erection pressing against me through his jeans, and I was pretty sure he could feel my own boner through my skirt, and he tugged me back inside in the direction of his unmade bed, and I put up no resistance. I proceeded to spend some quality time sucking his dick: I’d already gotten intimate with his gear, but this was the first time I’d had the opportunity to enjoy him at my leisure, lights on and unrushed, and I was enjoying myself immensely.

And then he reached up inside my skirt, and found my own cock. It was roughly the same size as his, but perpetually firm, and an entirely different shade of electric blue. I wasn’t wearing any panties under my harness, and my cunt was as wet as Niagara Falls.

He didn’t skip a beat; that was the moment I knew he was a keeper. He opened his mouth wide, swallowed more of my hard-on than I would have thought possible, and proceeded to suck my dick while finger-fucking my pussy to a quick-and-dirty, wet-and-squirmy orgasm. Then we fucked.

Jeremy did it to me from behind, jerking me off as he slid his dick in and out of my pussy, and teasing but not actually penetrating my asshole, and I remember thinking it was hotter than hell. My tits swung like pendulums, and my silicone cock felt like an extension of my clit. But he couldn’t come through the condom, so we disengaged, and ended up sitting on his bed, watching each other whack off, which was also pretty damn hot. I’ve always liked watching dudes masturbate. It’s sexy.

Ok, so now I’m plenty wet, and my clit is hard and poking out, and this is happening for a second. And then I think about the very last time Jeremy and I had sex, and I totally lose it. Breakup sex is supposed to be wild, rough, and uninhibited, a last hurrah; ours was saccharine, mediocre and apologetic. Unsexy like a credit card bill. Just like that, I am dry all over again, arid as alkali flats.

I get out of bed all over again, and go for the quick fix: internet porn. I want to watch some videos of cute guys with big dicks jerking off, or jerking each other off, or shyly kissing and giving each other head. But between my antique laptop and my crappy internet connection, it is more frustrating than a fistful of limp dick, and I am forced to fall back on my imagination. Which, when it comes down to it, has always been my drug of choice anyway.

I walked in on my brother masturbating once. Looking back, I’m pretty sure he set it all up. His bedroom door was halfway open, and he was naked on his bed, surrounded by magazines.

He had the biggest dick I’d ever seen, at the time; and at the time (I’m ashamed to say) that was a huge turn-on for me. He didn’t stop what he was doing; he just looked up and leered. I turned right around and ran back to my own bedroom, where I masturbated like a feral weasel. This was before I’d discovered the joys of pornography, and that was the single sexiest thing I had witnessed to date. In retrospect, I’m fairly certain that Leo had intended for me to stay, and maybe join in with him. In retrospect, sometimes I wish I had.

Much, much, much later, I stumbled across my dad’s porn collection, hundreds, maybe thousands of photoshopped and airbrushed pictures downloaded off AOL. His taste was not my taste: he was big on 25-year old cheerleaders and busty women in improbable-looking Little Catholic Schoolgirl outfits, all neatly indexed and catalogued.

The image of my dad, bathed in the blue light of the computer monitor, dick in hand, masturbating to these images is almost painfully erotic. I imagine ambushing him, catching him in the act, wearing nothing but thigh-high stockings and my rig. I sit on his lap, our boners wagging in concert as we browse porn together. I stroke him, and he strokes me. And then he slips his penis inside… I may be a sick little cunt, but at least now I am wet.

Filthy and disgusting. Now things are slippery enough that I can masturbate. As long as I am thinking perverted, disturbing thoughts, I imagine fucking a dog, a big, black, shaggy dog with a long, slobbery tongue, sharp nails, and a fat, bulbous dick.

I manage to rub out a small orgasm. It is distinctly unsatisfying, and leaves me feeling frustrated and disgusted with myself. My hangover is rolling in like the high tide. I decide to take a shower. Lord knows I need one.

Red, red wine stains my lips like cheap lipstick. My mirror image sizes me up. Overall, I don’t look too bad. My tits aren’t the perky things they were back in college, but they’re still pretty cute. I’d fuck me. I crank the water up as hot as I can stand. My mirror-self disappears behind a billow of steam. She’s got a pretty cute ass, too.

In the shower, I think about my college girlfriend, Cynthia. We taught each other about kinky sexy, making it all up as we went along. One time she told me that I couldn’t do anything to her that she’d ever say ‘no’ to.

The first harness I ever bought was made of crappy black plastic that looked awful and fit worse. The dildo that came with it was an obscenely veiny latex schlong, the exact same grey color as cadaver flesh.

I bushwhacked her one afternoon while she was studying. Grabbed a double-fistful of her long, brown hair, and dragged her struggling across the dorm room. Never once letting go of her gorgeous, nut-brown locks, I crammed my dong down her throat until she choked and gagged. While she coughed and dry-heaved, I took the opportunity to handcuff her to the immense Victorian radiator that clicked and hissed and spat. Her pussy was sopping wet, purple, swollen, pouting open and droolingly ready. I poured lube all over my dildo and down between her pale ass cheeks, and shoved my dick up her virgin asshole. Cynthia screamed until I thought she was going to cough up blood. The rest of the dorm must have hated us. She never said ‘No’ to me.

Afterward, I lounged on the bed and stroked my cheap latex dick and ogled while she masturbated. It was the best sex I’d ever had, though I didn’t even have an orgasm. She looked at me like a beaten dog, and we broke up shortly after that, and I went back to dating guys, for the most part.

I only pegged Jeremy once, which is kind of ironic because I’d been wanting to do exactly that to him ever since I first set eyes on his sweet little ass. When he finally asked me, shyly and sweetly, my heart swelled up inside my chest, my clit stiffened and my pussy drooled.

Jeremy was nervous, and crazy tight. I tried to be super gentle with him. I can’t tell you how sexy he looked, splayed out before me, back arch and muscles tense, dick pointing straight out, impaled on my fat blue cock. I think I enjoyed the experience a lot more than he did. He never asked me to do it to him again.

Thinking about all this has made me hot and bothered again. I could masturbate right here in the shower, under the hot spray of water. I even own a vibrator designed expressly for that purpose, a small waterproof unit. I used it on Jeremy sometimes, when I would blow him in the shower: I’d hold it against his soft skin, that spot just below his ball sac, while I sucked his dick. That used to do the trick quite nicely.

But I am not in the right head space for the vibrator. I am feeling perverse and perverted. So I turn off the water, and exit the shower, leaving wet footprints across my bedroom floor. I strap my harness back on, and my cock juts eagerly out in front of me, bobbing as I move. I grab my fleshlight from its hiding place under the bed, and I slather it in lube. The orifice is shaped like a crinkled little asshole, soft and creepily realistic.

I jam my dick up inside. The toy swallows me readily. I hold it still with both hands, fucking it with my hips. I fully intended to start slow and soft and work my way up, but that isn’t happening. I back the toy up against the wall, and slam it with everything I’ve got. Each time I thrust, I get a jolt of pleasure from my clit as it is crushed against the base of my dildo. Harder and faster, and I am grunting and grimacing, the fleshlight is squelching satisfyingly, my dick slides in and out, and I am going to fucking come. This time it is for real. My ass clenches, my toes curl, my boobs shake and my nipples stiffen, and I howl out loud, and keep on fucking. The orgasm washes over me, pounding through me. I am tossed and tumbled, lost in time and place.

It wasn’t the sex that did Jeremy and me in, not at all. It was the Ten Thousand Things. All the small, stupid, mundane, crappy things that just piled on and added up and gummed up the machinery of our relationship until it simply didn’t work any more. Too much weight and friction. I’ll miss him, but now I am ready to face the day.

I take three Advil and get dressed. As usual, I am packing, a smaller, more discreet rig than the one I use for play time. If you look, you can see the bulge in the front of my jeans: a tangible ambiguity.

Outside my apartment, the sun is peeking through the clouds, and the Peaceable City is just waking up.

END

Comments (3)

Blessed Be

I found him hiding in a culvert in the far back, downhill end of my property. I wasn’t entirely surprised to find him there: the dogs had been barking overnight, and I’d heard helicopters.

I’d brought my shotgun, but I didn’t need it. The kid was in a bad way. He was covered in more-or-less congealed blood, twigs, dirt, and mud, and he wasn’t really conscious. His eyes were open, but I don’t know how much they were seeing. He looked up at me from about a thousand miles away, and made a noise that might have been “fuck’ and might have been “help”.

He was a skinny sack of shit and bones. Young kid, probably about the age of my own son when he died. Israel was driving drunk. I guess I’m just lucky he didn’t take anyone else with him. He was such a smart kid; how could he do something so fucking stupid? I never did forgive him for that.

I threw this kid over my shoulder and carried him, fireman style, back to the house.

Found his gun later on that same morning. It was in the mud, not far from that drainage ditch he’d crawled into. Nickel-plated Glock knock-off. The magazine was empty. There was still a round in the chamber. Jammed more than likely. The whole business went to the bottom of the lake, as far out as I could throw it.

Kid slept and slept like he never wanted to wake up. I wasn’t at all sure he was going to make it. He’d lost a lot of blood. Bullet had grazed his neck, just missed his right jugular. A fat chunk of shrapnel had lodged itself deep in his left gastrocnemius. He had a pretty high fever too, that just didn’t want to go down. I pumped him full of horse antibiotics. That seemed to do the trick.

I was jerking off when he finally woke up. Nothing unusual about that, for better or for worse. I was hanging out naked, just idly stroking, flipping through my stack of glossy old 1970’s skin mags, when I heard him croak out something that sounded like “water”.

My cock swinging back and forth like a pendulum, I brought him a tall, cool glass of water that he drank thirstily down. Didn’t say ‘thank you’. Didn’t say much of anything. I went back to what I was doing. I don’t know whether he watched or not.

Kid didn’t talk much. Even when I got him up and about, and on solid food, he mostly held his peace. Sullen, or just the quiet type, I don’t know. I never did learn his real name. Sort of didn’t want to, if you know what I mean. On the second or third day, a uniformed cop came knocking at my front door, asking if I’d seen or heard anything unusual in the past couple of days. Of course I hadn’t. On TV and the internet, the hubbub died down and faded into the usual background noise.

He walked in on me jerking off to an old VHS tape that Miriam and me had made way back when, years before she’d passed away, when she was still healthy and we were both young and good-looking. I heard him come in, but I didn’t stop. He was leaning pretty heavy on a cane; he’ll probably always walk with a limp.

“That you?” This was about as verbose as that kid got.

“Yup.”

“Shee-it.” On the grainy TV screen, Miriam is riding me cowgirl-style, bouncing up and down on my vertical cock. Her tits bounce in unison, her face is thrown back, pink and flushed with ecstasy. I’ve got to get around to converting those old tapes to digital.

I was about to tell him to pull up a chair and join in, but he turned away, went clunk-clunking off into the kitchen. I heard him open my refrigerator. Kid was on the mend. I returned my attention to the television and finished up what I’d been doing.

A couple days later, I walked on in on him. He was in the living room, trying to get my old Atari working, tangled up in a spaghetti mess of cords. I pulled the plug out of the wall, threw the console across the room. He didn’t say anything, but he gave me a filthy look.

I popped in a tape. This was one I’d shot myself, of Miriam giving me a blowjob. She loved to do that, and she was an artist when it came to fellatio, a true virtuoso. She could make me last for hours, blissful hours if she wanted to, bringing me off at the exact moment of her choice, and not an instant before. God, she had beautiful lips.

I pulled out my dick and stuck it in the kid’s face. “Go on,” I said, “Have a suck.”

“I have a girlfriend.”

“Used to have a girlfriend,” I corrected. I made the gun sign with my thumb and index finger: *pop* “Go ahead, it don’t bite.”

Well, he made it clear that he didn’t like it, but he had a go. I can’t tell you that he was very good at it either. Whatever else that kid might have been, he wasn’t no natural-born cocksucker. I ended up just jerking off onto his face. Which he just plain hated.

I took him that same night, in the upstairs bed I’d fixed up for him. He was asleep when I came in. I pulled the blanket off, and he stirred. He had a heavenly body, young and lithe, and the ugly mess of scar tissue on his leg and neck just made him all the more beautiful.

He was sleeping face-down in a pair of my old white-and-blue striped boxers. I cut them open, straight down the ass, with my deer-hunting knife. I thought for sure that would wake him up, but it didn’t.

I gave his plump ball sac a squeeze. That woke him up.

I went down on his asshole for a little while; as much to relax and moisten him, as for my own pleasure. He certainly wasn’t complaining. Kid was definitely a virgin. Holy shit, he was tight! I could barely get the tip of my tongue past his sphincter.

I probably should have worn a condom, but the fact is I just didn’t feel like it. Once I’d eaten him out a spell, gotten us both nice and hard, I climbed up on top of him and lay down. He knew what was coming.

He screamed when I penetrated him. For real. There was nothing fake about it, a long, drawn-out howl of pain and protest, insult and injury. Now, I don’t like to think of myself as a sadist or anything, but that scream was pretty damn gratifying. He grunted like he’d been stabbed every time I shoved my dick further in. His asshole gripped my cock like a fist. For me, it was pure bliss.

The kid may have been hating it, but his dick stayed nice and hard. “Go on, jerk off.” I whispered in his ear as I fucked him. I was going deep and slow, making every thrust count. “I’m not coming until you come.”

His face was buried in the pillow. He reached down between his legs and started frantically whacking off. I increased my tempo, pummeling his asshole with a literal vengeance. When he finally came, his whole body spasmed, and he cried out like a wounded animal, and it totally set me off. I shot off deep inside him, and collapsed on top of his prone body, kissing his head and the sweaty back of his neck, my penis still wedged up inside his twitching anus.

Back before, before the cancer had taken over Miriam’s body, she used to do that to me, now and again. I hated and loved it, craved and feared it. It was just one of those things that made our relationship so special. She used to call me a ‘sexual omnivore’, in the fondest way possible. I’m glad she didn’t live long enough to see Israel die.

I cut him loose the very next day. Drove him over to Union Station and dropped him off. Gave him a wallet with three hundred bucks inside, and Israel’s old driver’s license and social security card. It wouldn’t stand up to a serious background check, but for just getting by, it oughta do the trick.

I didn’t expect gratitude, and I didn’t get none. He looked at me, his big brown eyes utterly unreadable. “I done some fucked-up shit, didn’t I?”

“Yes you did. And now you get to live with that.”

I did some pretty bad stuff too, back in my wild days, but nothing on that level. He’d winged a cop, killed a pharmacist. I didn’t tell him that two of his stray bullets had killed a three-year old girl and put her mommy in a wheelchair, paralyzed from the waist down.

I watched him hobble off, leaning heavily on my old wooden cane, until he disappeared into the milling crowd, a pebble in the churning rapids. The kid’d be alright, I reckoned, so long as he stayed out of trouble and kept his head down.

END

Comments (2)

Grimm and Tonic

The Big Bad Wolf is playing EmpireCraft and doesn’t particularly want to hear about it when Little Red Ridinghood stalks into the apartment. She slams the door after herself, which makes Wolfy flinch and hurriedly close the website he had been browsing in between turns. If Ridinghood saw what he was looking at, he’d be embarrassed.

She sets her picnic basket down heavily on their twelve dollar Ikea coffee table, making it sag dangerously. The Wolf is familiar with this routine and knows what it means: another one-night stand; another swing-and-a-miss.

“I don’t get it,” Ridinghood announces petulantly.

The Big Bad Wolf makes a noncommittal wolfish sound. The game was going poorly anyway. London is on the verge of capitulating to the Irish Horde. It doesn’t help that he has been browsing porn while playing.

“I just don’t get it,” Little Red Ridinghood repeats. “Why can’t I come when I’m with a guy? I do just fine by myself. I can orgasm for days on end. But with a guy it’s like… I get this close, but it stays just barely out of reach.” She sat down heavily on the couch behind the computer desk. “It’s like… I get so fucking close, and then he starts humping away like crazy, and totally loses the rhythm. It drives me insane.”

There is a clunk and another clunk as Ridinghood takes off her boots. The Big Bad Wolf knows that her jeans and trademark red hoodie will be next. Ridinghood has a really bad habit of wandering around the apartment in nothing but her skivvies. He is going to have to say something to her about that. Sometime.

On the screen, Cromwell is fiddling while London burns. The Big Bad Wolf hears Ridinghood squirm out of her street clothes. Despite himself, his dick tingles and stirs inside his pants. At the same time, his tail bushes up like a Halloween cat. He wonders if she gets the connection. He wonders if she even cares.

“Guys are easy,” Little Red Ridinghood went on, “All you have to do is apply a little friction, maybe add a touch of wet; rub, repeat, and not stop. Why do girls have to be so tricky?”

“Maybe you should try fucking a girl,” the Wolf says, “and then you both could not come together. I heard Rapunzel goes both ways.”

“Up yours,” Little Red Ridinghood tells him, but not in an unkind way. She ruffles the Wolf’s hair between his ears, which makes him crazy, and retires to her own bedroom. The Wolf tries, and fails, to ignore the muffled humming drone of her vibrator.

*

“Bigger isn’t always better,” Little Red Ridinghood announces over coffee. The Big Bad Wolf winces as the toaster ka-chunks and spits out a pair of PopTarts. He is hung over, in a pretty brutal way. Goldilocks was over last night, while Ridinghood was out with Rumpelstiltskin. Wolfy and Goldi wrapped themselves around an improbable amount of gin and tonics, and hung out and talked into the wee hours of the morning. Bitching and complaining mainly, mostly about their love lives and the lack thereof. The Big Bad Wolf could probably have fucked her, or at least gotten a blowjob, if he’d made any serious effort. But he hadn’t. Probably for the best, the Wolf reflects; Goldilocks is a friend and a really cute girl, but she has her own issues, and more than her share of baggage. The Big Bad Wolf gets a reasonable amount of sex, for a single creature, but he is a lonely Wolf.

Ridinghood is unfailingly chipper in the morning, a condition the Big Bad Wolf alternately envies and loathes. She likes to recount her previous night’s adventures over PopTarts and coffee, and the Wolf likes to torture himself by listening.

“I mean, don’t get me wrong,” Little Red Ridinghood continues with a smirk plastered across her face, and a frosted breakfast pastry in one hand. “I like a big dick as much as the next girl. But Rumpelstiltskin’s schlong is way out of bounds. I mean, it hurt. Holy shit, just getting it in was an engineering challenge. And then he wouldn’t just be done. He’s one of those guys who thinks that the girl always has to come first, and who get’s all pouty and bent out of shape if she doesn’t…” She sighs, bites the PopTart in half. “I had to fake it, just so he’d get off. I’ve gotten pretty good at faking it, over the years.”

The Big Bad Wolf has heard plenty of Ridinghood’s fake orgasms, and he disagrees. To his ears, they just sound fake. But he keeps his big fat trap shut. As usual.

*

The Big Bad Wolf has a lunch date with Grandma. They meet up at a hipster little bistro on Gingerbread Lane, a couple blocks off the L train. Grandma wears leather pants, probably an unfortunate choice, the Wolf reflects ruefully. She’s not bad looking at all, not for her age, but still… Leather pants?

The Wolf always feels a bit like a whore when he’s out with Grandma. He eats a tiny, exquisitely crafted and shockingly overpriced baguette, and they go through the requisite motions:

“My, what big ears you have!”

..sigh… “The better to hear you with, Grandma.”

“My, what big eyes you have!”

“The better to see you with, Grandma.”

“My, what big paws you have Wolfy! I wonder what else you have that is big…?”

This is the Wolf’s cue to signal the waiter. Grandma picks up the check as always, which the Wolf shouldn’t really mind, but does anyway. It’s kind of emasculating. Being kept can be a mixed blessing. They retire to Grandma’s apartment, the doorman winking knowingly and obnoxiously.

Once inside, Grandma peels off those hideous black leather pants. She takes good care of her body; she must have been seriously hot when she was younger. She still looks good, damned good. The Wolf is fully erect, and it isn’t just a Pavlovian response.

Grandma likes it hard, rough, and from behind. She bends over her Barcalounger, and pulls her lacy sapphire panties to one side. The Big Bad Wolf slathers his cock in lube (Grandma doesn’t get wet like she used to), and jams it up inside her. Grandma grunts and the Wolf utters a long, drawn-out howl. He may feel like a whore, but right now feeling like a whore feels pretty damn good. She likes it hard and fast, so he gives it to her hard and fast, shoving his cock all the way up her pussy before pulling it almost all the way out and then slamming it back inside. The wolf smacks Grandma’s ass as he fucks her; he claws at her back and nips the back of her neck with fangs that could pierce bone crush vertebrae. Grandma loves it, and she lets him know, loud and clear. It doesn’t take long. She comes hard on the Wolf’s thrusting cock; and when he yanks her steel-grey hair and slides one slick, manicured finger up her crinkled asshole, she comes a second time, just for good measure.

The Big Bad Wolf finishes inside her. Which isn’t a bad way to finish, no not really bad at all.

They relax nude over Bombay Gin with just a hint of tonic, thrown in for propriety’s sake.

“So, when are you going to fuck her?”

“Who?” the Wolf asks, startled out of his hazy post-coital reverie.

“Your roommate, of course. Red. When are you going to fuck that spicy little piece of ass?”

“Oh… Her. She says I’m her best friend. She says I’m too nice. She doesn’t want to spoil a perfectly good friendship.”

“What-ever.” Grandma lounges back in her Barcalounger, spreading her legs and giving the Wolf an eyeful of her juicy, freshly-fucked twat. A twat that appears to be ready for round two. “Fuck her. I would.” She takes a big fat drink, and smacks her lips. “If I were in your shoes, I’d totally jump on that red-haired action.”

*

Little Red Ridinghood walks right in on the Wolf masturbating to a porn video. The wolf likes amateur porn, and he favors redheads.

“Oh!” she exclaims, “Excuse me!”

She almost seems to hesitate a moment, and the Big Bad Wolf almost thinks about asking her to stay. But she is already gone.

*

Morning coffee and toasted PopTarts. The Wolf drank too much again and has a headache. Little Red Ridinghood is just as chipper as always, though the Wolf knows she stumbled in not three hours earlier after a date with Pinocchio.

“I swear, that boy doesn’t know when to stop!” Ridinghood bitched, with a peculiar combination of petulance and smugness. “I mean, he’s made out of wood!”

The Wolf sighs. He’s not sure he wants to hear this. But he is all ears.

“He fucked me raw. He’s not all that hung, you know, he just never gets soft. The boy is insatiable. It was kind of cute at first, but then it just got painful. My coochie is going to be sore for days. And it’s not like I even got to get off.” She sighs dramatically, spreads her legs and runs her fingers gingerly up and down the crotch of her grey sweat pants. “He can do some pretty interesting tricks with his nose though…”

This is too much for the Big Bad Wolf. He excuses himself, makes his exit, takes six Advil and a very long, very hot shower. He jerks off under the running water and feels sorry for himself afterward.

*

The Three Little Pigs are a trio of fat, greasy, horny little porkers, and they make no apologies for it. To get into their apartment, the Big Bad Wolf has to go through the whole “I’ll huff and I’ll puff…” routine, which was cute like ten years ago, but is kind of annoying when you have a hard-on the size of the state of Florida wedged into your pants. But when they do open the door and let him in, it’s all worthwhile.

The Three Little Pigs adore being eaten out. The one thing they all like almost as much as being on the receiving end of cunnilingus is watching a fat, juicy piggy pussy getting licked. The Wolf is always happy to oblige.

The Piggies get naked faster than you could say ‘higgledy-piggledy’. They are utterly uninhibited little creatures, all pink and roly-poly and jiggly and wiggly. Their breasts are big and bouncy, their bottoms are wide, their pussies are wet and slippery, and their tails are tight little corkscrews. They lounge on the bed and watch lasciviously while the Big Bad Wolf gets undressed. His cock is already plenty hard, and they ‘Oooh’ and ‘Aaah’ with unfeigned admiration. The Little Piggies are nothing if not an enthusiastic audience.

The First Little Piggy spreads her legs, and the Big Bad Wolf dives in. She is sopping wet and juicy, and her taste is oh-so-slightly reminiscent of bacon. The Big Bad Wolf would love to slather maple syrup all over her crack, and lick it clean. Maybe sometime he will. He slurps up and down her pussy, dragging the flat of his long tongue between her puffy pink labia and slathering her clit.

The Big Bad Wolf inserts first one, then two, and finally three thick fingers into the First Little Piggy’s cunt. He finger-fucks her, gently at first, spreading her wetness up and down and all around, then harder and harder, until he is lifting her pelvis all the way up off the bed with his fingers. With his fingers buried deep inside the First Little Piggy, he bends over and laps at her clitoris.

The other two Piggies ‘Oooh’ and ‘Aaah’. They will all get their turn, but they are not patient creatures, and they have started in on each other while they watch the show, touching, nibbling and kissing. The Piggies are certainly not lesbians, and it is just a little bit like incest, but right now they don’t care. The Second and Third Little Piggies are intertwined like double helixes, stubby little fingers getting busy between fat thighs; their little piggy eyes glued to the Big Bad Wolf and the action on the futon mattress.

The First Little Piggy surrenders to her excitement, grunting and squealing and huffing and puffing her way toward a massive orgasm. Meanwhile, the Big Bad Wolf is already thinking about where he is going to come. The Piggies don’t hold with fucking or sucking, but once they have all gotten off (at least once, maybe twice, or more), one of them will jerk him off, and he gets to choose where he comes: boobies, or ass, or squirting off onto a wide-spread piggy pussy, or into an open mouth, or even all over one of their plump pink porcine faces. It’s not a bad arrangement. Not at all.

Once the First Little Piggy has settled down and extracted herself from the Wolf’s long and sticky fingers, he goes to work on the Second Little Piggy, who is halfway there already. Delayed gratification has never been the Piggies strong suite.

It doesn’t take long for the Big Bad Wolf to finish off the Second and then the Third Little Piggy, and by then the First Little Piggy is ready to go all over again. The Wolf is getting tired and frustrated, but he does his duty, using more tongue and less fingers this time, bending the First Little Piggy over the back of their ratty old couch and burying his long snout between her cheeks, licking up and down the cleft of her ass, alternately tonguing her pussy and asshole, letting her do the clit stimulation herself, until she comes one last time, squealing and oinking with pleasure. It is, he has to admit, pretty gratifying.

The Big Bad Wolf has made his choice. The Second and Third Little Piggies each lend a hand while the First Little Piggie sprawls limply across the futon. It doesn’t take long; it has been several days since he has gotten off, and he’s overexcited anyway. Howling at an invisible moon, the Wolf shoots off all over the First Little Piggy’s not-so-little tits. His balls twitch and tremble and he squirts gobs and gobs of pearlescent white semen across her chest and beyond, splashing onto the futon. They will definitely need to change the cover after this afternoon.

Temporarily sated, the four friends get dressed and have a drink. The Piggies favor vodka tonics, with more vodka than tonic. They want to know when he’s going to get around to fucking Ridinghood. He tells them she just wants to be friends, and they laugh at him, which is annoying. Mildly buzzed, the Big Bad Wolf strolls homeward, his balls hanging low and loose, the intoxicating smell of piggy pussy still lingering on his fingers.

When Wolf gets back to the apartment, Riding Hood is in her bedroom, getting loudly and vigorously fucked.

The Wolf attempts to ignore it. He fires up his computer, puts on some music, tries to concentrate on EmpireCraft. It doesn’t work. The sounds of Riding Hood getting banged keep leaking right through his expensive headset. Who is it? The Gingerbread Man? Tom Tom the Piper’s Son? Jack Sprat? It doesn’t really matter. Whoever it is certainly is enthusiastic. And Riding Hood is faking orgasms all over the place.

Wolf splits over to the House of Candy and proceeds to get fucked-up drunk.

*

Several days later. Wolf was supposed to have a date with Grandma, but she cancelled at the last minute, and he doesn’t really mind. He is playing EmpireCraft, and looking at naked girls on the internet; alt-tabbing between the two, and as usual, his game is suffering for it. The Ottoman Empire is foundering; the Irish have developed mechanized warfare and are overrunning North Africa. He doesn’t hear Riding Hood come in.

“Cute tits,” Little Red Ridinghood observes.

The Big Bad Wolf is looking at redheads, in various states of undress. He alt-tabs back to his game, where the Irish Hordes are sacking Jerusalem. Under his fur, he is blushing, but Ridinghood doesn’t seem to notice.

“I’d do her,” she goes on. “I wish mine were a little bigger. Not huge, just a little bigger.”

“I think yours are perfect,” says the Wolf. His tail is poking out the back of his pants, big and bushy, like a scared cat. It always gets big and bushy when he gets an erection.

“Thank you!” Ridinghood says. “I’d like to see her pussy.”

The Big Bad Wolf switches windows and clicks on the ‘next’ button. This picture does indeed show the cute redhead’s pussy. It is shaved, with fat, pouting lips.

“Cute pussy! It looks a little like mine, except I have more hair. It would look cuter with a big fat wolf dick stuffed up inside it though.” Ridinghood informs the Wolf. His tail gets even bushier. Before he can think of an appropriate response, she is gone.

*

The Big Bad Wolf is in the shower. In the kitchen, the coffee pot is burbling and hissing. Ridinghood is still asleep in her bedroom. She always sleeps in men’s boxers and a t-shirt. The Wolf is seriously considering jerking off in the shower. He hasn’t started yet, but as far as his penis is concerned, the decision is already made.

Little Red Ridinghood walks into the bathroom. She is wearing tartan boxer shorts and an oversized t-shirt that reads ‘WHO THE FUCK IS MICK JAGGER?’ She still has sleepy eyes. She reaches around the shower curtain, grabs the Wolf by the erection, and pulls him straight out of the bathtub.

She waits while he does a perfunctory towel-off of his soaking-wet black fur. The whole time he can feel her eyes on his body, hungry.

He follows her into her bedroom, which is a mess of an epic sort. They land on the bed.

There is a lot of kissing. The kissing is really nice, and they both want more of it, but they are also both eager to move on to other, more urgently pressing matters.

The Big Bad Wolf pulls off Ridinghood’s boxers. She does indeed have a very pretty pussy with pink, eager inner labia and a soft muss of red hair atop it like a cowlick. He takes an ankle in each paw and lifts her up to his face.

He drags his tongue along the length of her pussy, exploring in between the puffy outer lips. She is very excited. She tastes delicious. When his tongue brushes across the erect nubbin of her clit, she bucks and squirms. “Fuck me!” she demands, her voice raspy and urgent, but the Wolf does not stop.

Up and down, up and down he laps, the flat of his tongue dragging lazily across her labia, caressing her clitoris. Wolf is holding her ankles up over his head so that the only part of her body that is touching the bed are her shoulders, outstretched arms, and the back of her head. Her red hair is flying like it is in a whirlwind. She struggles, but she doesn’t get away. The Big Bad Wolf is a strong animal, with long, ropy muscles. “Fuck me Wolfy! Goddamn it, fuck me! Fuck me, please!”

He lifts her up a little more. Now it is just her red hair that is touching the sheets. He buries his snout between her ass cheeks. His long, wolfish finds her anus and squirms up inside. She squeals incoherently, twisting and flailing, whimpering his name, begging him.

Finally the Big Bad Wolf relents. He plops Ridinghood back onto her bed, where she lies, twitching and mumbling, her legs spread wide apart, her fingers running lightly petting her sodden cunt. The Wolf could watch this show all day. But not today.

He wastes precious time looking for condoms, before Ridinghood tells him “In the little wooden box, under the bed.” There are some other interesting items in there too, ones that the Wolf would be very interested in trying out with Ridinghood sometime. But not this time.

Properly wrapped, the Big Bad Wolf slides his cock right up into Ridinghood’s pussy. She is hot and wet and slippery and very excited and ready for him. She wraps her legs around his butt, just under his tail, pulling him closer and deeper. He is too far-gone to last very long; she doesn’t care.

Her cunt squeezes him tight. He is fucking her as slowly as he can stand, and it isn’t slow enough. He is going to explode.

She starts to huff and puff. “Oh, oh, oh, oooh, yes! Oh yes Wolfy! Yessss!”

The Wolf stops fucking, curls his tail and clenches his toes to keep from popping off. He bares his teeth and snarls. “Oh no you don’t. Don’t you dare fake it! Not with me!” He is still an alpha predator. His hair bristles angrily.

Ridinghood quiets down, knocks off the moaning and sighing, kisses him on the snout. “Just come inside me then Wolfy. Just come for me” He is happy to oblige.

He cups her ass in both paws, lifts her up, slides one finger from each hand up her asshole, and fucks her hard and deep. He lasts longer than he imagined he might. She keeps quiet, biting down hard on her lower lip, watching him fuck her. She almost comes, she tells him later. She could feel it. She didn’t quite get there, but almost.

After he comes, he keeps his cock inside her, and she rubs her clitoris for him. This time she really does come, and it is beautiful to watch. When she finally orgasms, holding her breath and flexing her abdominal muscles spasmodically, her face is a mask of silent ecstasy. Her pussy twitches on his cock. You can’t fake that shit.

They kiss some more, and he extracts his wilting, condom-enclosed cock from her still-drooling pussy. She sits on his chest and masturbates to another orgasm, this one just as beautiful as the first. He helps by slipping a finger up her pussy and tickling her asshole. They will fuck again after they’ve had coffee.

“Wolfy, did you know you’re my best friend?”

“You’re my best friend too, Red.”

“I’m crazy about you Wolfy.”

He squeezes her tight. Maybe next time they fuck he will make her come. Or the time after that. Maybe she’ll come rubbing her clit with his cock wedged in her ass; maybe she’ll come all over his long and slurping tongue, or on his probing insistent fingers. The truth is, it doesn’t really matter. It will be a long journey, and they will both have a lot of fun.

And they live happily ever after.

END

Comments (6)

Two Ships at Night on a Dark and Restless Sea

I wake up with a start, suddenly shockingly, lucidly conscious. I’d been having a disturbing dream that I don’t quite remember now, but which lingers on the edge of my memory like an unpleasant taste. I look over at the glowing red digits of our alarm clock. It is 2:22 a.m.

What woke me up? I have no idea. Certainly not Dennis, my husband. He is lying next to me. I can hear him quietly breathing.

The bed is shaking, trembling oh so softly. It takes me a moment to figure out what just what is going on. Dennis is jerking off, right there beside me in our bed. He has the sheet flipped back, so that his cock is exposed to the darkness of the night, and he is slowly, softly masturbating.

I almost reached over and grabbed his dick from him, finished the job myself. Maybe I should have. But I didn’t.

I wish I could tell you how long it’s been, but I can’t. Dennis and I get it on once ever couple, three months. It usually seems adequate. We’ve been together twenty years now, nearly ten of those years married. I guess I always assumed that he jerks off from time to time, but the reality of it stabs me in the gut.

I think back to Kristov, my very first. I was in my mid-teens, too smart for my own good, and horny beyond description. Kristov was my tennis instructor, and if my mom ever found out, even today, it would kill her. He was ten, fifteen years my senior, easy. He should have known better. He did know better. I blatantly seduced him.

We’d been flirting all the way through the lesson. Kristov seemed to be flirting back There was a lump in the front of his white tennis shorts that hadn’t been there earlier. I was gratified to see that my newly minted powers of seduction were working. I stuck my hand down his shorts and told him I wanted him to fuck me cross-eyed. The poor guy didn’t know what to say. But his dick answered loud and clear.

With that established, we progressed rapidly through tongue-kissing and dry-humping to the art of furtive handjobs and finger-banging (a joy in and of itself!); with a brief pause for refreshment; and then straight to the main event, which occurred in the passenger seat of his little black Miata on the bottom floor of a parking garage. The ambience wasn’t what I’d call exactly romantic, and his sports car was only slightly more cramped than a Soyuz capsule.

I thought his dick looked beautiful, crowned with an explosion of blonde pubic hair, and I wanted it inside me, like yesterday. He didn’t want to wear a condom, but I insisted. I was horny, not stupid. He had some in the glove compartment. By this point I was beyond excited; my pussy was quite literally drooling, leaving slime trails all over his black leather bucket seat. Safely wrapped, he climbed on top and kissed me some more and played with my tits a little before skewering my cunt. I won’t say it didn’t hurt when he penetrated me, but I didn’t really mind. I’d expected it. And once he was well inside and thrusting, I knew that I’d hit jackpot.

I wrapped my legs around his white little butt, kicking the rearview mirror right off the windshield, grabbed the headrest with both hands, and screamed like a howler monkey. He shot off inside me about two seconds later, his cock pulsating and spasming like a dying animal, thrusting like mad and filling the condom to overflowing with his hot semen.

In retrospect, I know that Kristov had a fairly small penis. Not that I’m complaining; on the contrary, for my purposes it was perfect. I couldn’t get enough of it either. He taught me to suck it for him. He was uncircumcised, which was kind of exotic, though I didn’t know it at the time. He was no mini, but definitely on the petite size. It fit inside me perfectly. Possibly a little too perfectly. I could feel myself starting to get addicted.

Kristov fucked me three times, and each time was a little better than the time before. He lasted a little longer each time; the last time he did it to me, I even had an orgasm on him.

I broke it off after that. Quit tennis, never played again. I was in danger of falling in love with Kristov and his scandalous dick, and I wanted to nip it in the bud. I hope I didn’t do him any damage. All in all, he was a pretty good guy.

Next to me in bed, Dennis’ rhythm has changed. He is doing it a little faster, a little more insistently now. I wish I could see, but I can barely make out his profile in the darkness, and I don’t want to move and let him know I am awake.

I don’t know why it should bother me that he is masturbating now, in our dark bedroom, but it does. I could never get enough. Even back in the day, when me and Dennis were crazy about each other and screwing like weasels, I used to whack off behind his back, look at pornography, fantasize about fucking different guys, teasing and flirting and generally pushing my luck.

Oh, I’ve strayed a couple times. I even paid for it once. Yes I did. It wasn’t so long ago, last summer. Our regular receptionist called in sick (Hung-over, most likely. Ricky was a pale and anorexic-looking tight-jeaned young raver. Not my type at all. And yes, I would probably fuck him given half a chance.) The temp that they sent over was exactly my cup of tea though. He looked just like Teddy Ruxpin. He might have been twenty-one. He was a little chunky; he had curly brown hair and hairy forearms and a bit of a belly, and the biggest, most adorable brown eyes.

I flirted with him shamelessly all morning, and he seemed to be flirting back. I am well aware that I am no supermodel, especially since I’ve gained some weight, so as he responded to my playful innuendo, I just got bolder and bolder.

I sat down on the counter next to his swivel chair. “What are you having for lunch?” I asked. If he looked, he could see straight up my shirt, black panties framed by fat white thighs.

“I brought a sandwich,” he said, holding up a paper bag as evidence. “What are you going to eat?”

“For a nickel,” I informed him, licking my lips lasciviously, “I’d eat you.”

He turned bright tomato red. “I have a girlfriend,” he sputtered. I don’t think he would have said that if I was skinny.

“Doesn’t bother me,” I said. My panties were distinctly moist, my hands trembling. “I’ll give you sixty bucks, but you have to go down on me first.”

“For real?”

“For real.”

I gave him three twenties, and we retreated to my boss’ office. Sharon was out for a lunch meeting, and I knew she wouldn’t be back until after three. We did it right there on her desk. I’ve never told her, but I’m pretty sure she would approve.

I peeled off my panties and sat back, and he went to town. God, he was good! His girlfriend was one lucky gal. Dennis eats pussy too, but not like that! His tongue was busy, restless, dancing up and down my slit, darting here and there, circling my clit and then moving on, teasing me mercilessly, intentionally or not. It was sweet, sweet torture. I was wet like Lake Michigan. When I finally did come, I pretty much suffocated him between my thighs. Not one word of complaint though.

As much as I enjoyed him going down on me, I relished sucking his dick even more. It had been ages since I had sucked a cock—Dennis and I usually just skip straight to the main act—and I relished it. I relished every inch of it. He was pretty hung; nice and thick, slightly bent, hairy and circumcised. I would have happily taken it in my pussy, climbed on board and ridden him, bouncing up and down until he filled my pussy with his juice, girlfriend be damned. But I restrained myself. I sucked him like a gobstopper. The head got more and more purple and swollen the more I licked. He tasted delicious. I love the taste of man, sweaty and clean. I loved playing with his fat balls. He squealed out loud when I stuck a wet finger up his asshole. I think he may have been a virgin to that. I kept my finger lodged up there while I jerked him off, my lips wrapped tightly around his over-inflated glans, and shortly thereafter he came in my mouth, grunting like a bear and pumping out what seemed like about a gallon and a half of sticky, salty semen. I was pretty much in heaven. I swallowed every drop and licked his wilting member clean before gently extracting my finger, a process that made him giggle.

“I’d have done it for free,” he said.

“Yeah, but this way you made sixty bucks,” I told him. “Take your girlfriend out to dinner.”

She’s a lucky girl. I kind of wish I had fucked him.

There is this girl at the gym I am dying to fuck. I don’t even know her name. We have roughly the same workout schedule. I’ve been watching her get undressed, shower, and put on her street clothes for the last couple months. I’m pretty sure she knows I’ve been watching too. She always picks a locker close by mine, and she has dropped all pretensions of modesty with her towel.

She has short hair, black with a blue streak. She’s probably half my age. She shaves her pussy, the way all the kids do these days, I guess. She has these enormous, round boobs that I am absolutely dying to touch. And to suck on. And I don’t even like big tits!

This girl has the sexiest ass ever. I would love to fuck her little asshole. I wonder if she likes it that way. Dennis used to butt-fuck me from time to time. He was always a little hesitant, like he wasn’t sure I was really into it. I’m not sure when we stopped doing that. It always made me come. It feels so intimate! There is nothing like coming with a cock in your ass, your clit bulging out and on fire, your pussy drooling and grasping at air while your man abandons restraint, thrusting deep inside you, fucking your harder, pummeling and brutalizing your wide-stretched anus.

I’d love to fuck her that way. I’d take her right there in the locker room. Bend her over the bench and lick her from clit to asshole and back again, making her pretty little pussy all wet and wide open, sticking my tongue in her ass until she is positively begging for it. I’d start with one finger, wet with my own pussy juice, work it gently inside. Damn, she’d be tight! The sound of her moaning would change, get softer and more intense. I’d keep my tongue busy, kissing and licking her backside while I worked my finger deeper into her anus. I’d add a second finger, and she’d growl with pleasure, humping back up against me. My other hand would find her clitoris, her tiny, needy button, and I’d pet it, just barely stroking, drawing little circles, while I sodomized her deeper and deeper. And then she’d come, her whole body flailing and bucking and twisting, while my invading fingers stretched her to her absolute limit.

She’d kiss me shyly, and get dressed and leave, leaving me there to masturbate shamelessly right there in the showers, where just anyone could walk in and see.

Next to me, Dennis’ hand is moving faster and faster. The bed is making tiny squeaking noises now, like a hamster wheel. Suddenly he freezes. His hand stops and his whole body goes rigid, and I know he is coming. I hold perfectly still, waiting for his breathing to resume.

He gropes by the side of the bed for a dirty sock to wipe up with. What is it with guys and dirty socks? Maybe I should reach over, dip my finger in the puddle spread it around his belly before bringing my wet finger to my lips and tasting his salty essence. I could lick him clean, kiss him on the lips, whisper in his ear that I still love him.

It is 2:26 in the morning. My pussy is drenched. My clit is hard and erect, throbbing urgently with every heartbeat. I am making a little wet spot on our clean sheets. I can hear Dennis breathing again, the slower, deeper sound of sleep. I wonder what it would feel like to be divorced.

END

Comments (10)

The Summer I Learned to Fly

That summer started out badly, with a pretty much total core meltdown. Our house was being foreclosed on; dad was under indictment (I still don’t know exactly what the crime was—some kind of financial chicanery that was shady and technical); and mom completely lost her shit and had to be hospitalized.

That would have left the three of us—Me, Tacoma, and Ryan—in the lurch in a pretty serious way. Except that Uncle John and Aunt Ellen stepped in and swept us away for the summer, all the way across the country to their immense and rambling old farmhouse in upstate New York.

It was a tough time for me. I’m sure it was hard for my older brother and sister too, but at the time I was too self-centered and wrapped up in my own problems to think about them. I was an awkward kid, introverted and perpetually self-conscious. I have Cerebral Palsy, which means my legs are twisted like pretzels and I need two canes and leg braces to walk; ugly metal braces that clunk with each step. To compound that, I was a late bloomer, compared to all the other girls in my class. I finally hit puberty, and it was like an F-16 switching on the afterburner. Paradoxically, that just made me feel like even more of an outsider. I got my period, fitfully and unpredictably, and I started growing breasts; small but sensitive speed bumps that made me feel like everyone was always staring at my chest. My sexuality suddenly made the quantum leap from occasionally having my G.I. Joes and Barbies play out unnatural acts together to furtive pornography-looking and actual masturbation. Lots and lots of actual masturbation.

I probably would have been miserable anyway, but at the time being yanked away from everything familiar was a kick in the gut.

On the other hand, I had just begun to experiment with my superpowers. Maybe it was a side effect of the CP and maybe not, but I discovered that if I sat very still and concentrated, I could go invisible. It took a fair amount of concentration, and if I stayed that way too long I got a headache, but it worked, and I clasped that knowledge close to me like a precious jewel.

I spent most of the flight from SeaTac to JFK in an aisle seat with my pants around my ankles, playing with my pussy, letting my fingers wander up, down, and sometimes inside my moist slit, idly toying with my clitoris and thinking dirty thoughts. Occasionally, depending on my level of excitement, my focus would lapse, and I’d flicker in and out of view, like interference on a TV set. This caused great consternation for the middle-aged businessman across the aisle. I think I may have given him whiplash: he’d catch a glimpse of me out of the corner of his eye with my pants down, legs splayed into the aisle, shirt lifted up, tits hanging out, my hand busy between my legs; and by the time he’d swiveled his head around, I’d be invisible again.  He must have thought he was hallucinating, or seeing some erotic ghost.

By the time we landed in New York I had a pounding migraine and a very sore pussy. I could hardly walk, never mind the canes and braces. It was hot and humid, and JFK smelled like jet fuel and Porto-potty. I was exhausted.

Uncle John and Aunt Ellen met us just on the other side of security. They were old and fat and homely, a pair of life-sized garden gnomes, complete with little red noses. Uncle John swept us up, Aunt Ellen took control of our luggage, and we all piled into their extended-cab pickup truck. It was ridiculously cramped inside the truck. I was sandwiched uncomfortably in between Tacoma and Ryan. My clit was chaffed, and inside my pants, my panties were obnoxiously damp.

It was a two-hour drive upstate to our Aunt and Uncle’s place, and mercifully, I slept most of the way. When I woke up, it was dark, and we were there, and my leg had fallen asleep. Tacoma laughed at me as I struggled up the steps onto the porch. It was not a very auspicious start to the summer.

I slept hard in a strange bed, and felt better the next morning than I had in weeks, not since all the weirdness with our parents had started going down.

The next morning Uncle John made us a big fat pancake breakfast wearing—literally—nothing but a bathrobe, and Aunt Ellen smoked a doobie and invited us to explore the place. “You guys don’t have to worry about anything,” she said. “You’re family here.” Despite my uncle’s scandalously naked pale hairy thigh and the unaccustomed sickly-sweet reek of marijuana smoke, I had the feeling that it was all going to be OK.

The place was an old apple farm, long gone fallow. It was a sort of heaven for able-bodied kids to explore: there were acres and acres of rolling hills, studded with grassy meadows and bent and gnarled old trees; there were any number of old outbuildings in various states of falling down-ness and disrepair; there was a huge and stately old red barn with an alluring and deeply-dangerous looking hayloft. Ryan and Tacoma promptly disappeared, often all day long, coming home for dinner sunburned, sweaty, scraped-up, muddy, and full of glee.

Me, I kept mostly to the house, which was plenty interesting and challenging all by itself. The place was huge. I never counted rooms, but there must have been well over a dozen. There were three stories, plus an oppressively hot and dusty attic, and all the bedrooms were on the second and third floors. The stairs were tough, steep and winding and more than a little scary, but they were a challenge I was up for, not like the hundred-year old homemade ladder up to the hayloft. While my older brother and sister tore around the property and the surrounding countryside, I methodically explored the house, from the dank and musty basement to the hot and gabled attic. Including, not incidentally, my aunt and uncle’s bedrooms.

Aunt Ellen and Uncle John were not a conventional couple; we figured that out pretty much right away. Aside from the fact that they both smoked a lot of dope (they offered us some; Tacoma and I declined, but Ryan sometimes took them up on it); and the fact that they both had a habit of walking around half- or more than half-naked; aside from all that, they both had separate bedrooms, and from time to time there would be strange cars parked in the driveway at night, cars that would be gone by morning. I can’t have been the only one who noticed that.

They were both professors, and taught at the local community college. They both had summer classes, so they were usually gone for a large portion of the day, which facilitated my mission, because I wasn’t very good at moving quietly around the house.

Aunt Ellen had a huge—and I mean huge—collection of sex toys. It filled an entire drawer in her dresser, and ranged from small and discreet to enormous and frightening. Some of that stuff I didn’t have any clue what you were even supposed to do with. I figured she wouldn’t mind if I borrowed a small, lipstick-shaped vibrator. She would probably never even notice it was missing.

I found a treasure trove of pornography in Uncle John’s room: some VHS tapes and DVDs, but mainly books and magazines. And to my glee, they mainly featured guys. Naked, muscular, well-endowed young guys, erect and flaccid, posing alone or in groups, fucking and getting fucked. I had pretty much hit the jackpot.

Well, whacking off with a stolen vibrator to glossy pictures of teenage boys fucking each other was plenty hot for a summer afternoon or two, but the truth is it mostly just made me hungry for more. I hadn’t gone invisible much yet that summer; there hadn’t really been any reason to, but I decided it was high time I put my superpower to good use.

They rolled in well after midnight. We had all had dinner together (Uncle John always did the cooking), watched some PBS, and then gone to bed. I hadn’t heard them leave, but I did hear them come back. I sat up in bed when I heard the front door slam. I set my jaw, concentrating hard, and went invisible. As quietly as possible, I got up, put on my braces, and then slowly and agonizingly, one foot in front of the other, I traversed my bedroom floor, cracked the door, and peeked out into the hallway.

I was just in time for them to breeze past me. There were four of them: My aunt and uncle, and two girls I didn’t recognize. They reeked of alcohol, tobacco, and marijuana. They were trying to be quiet, but they weren’t succeeding very well. Staying invisible, I followed them up to the third floor, where Aunt Ellen and Uncle John had their bedrooms. Climbing the stairs was terrifying and painfully slow.

Once I was up the stairs, I maneuvered along the hallway as quietly as I could with my canes and braces. The door to Aunt Ellen’s bedroom was ajar. It was almost as if they wanted to get caught. (Maybe that’s exactly what they wanted. That hypothesis didn’t occur to me until much later.)

Secure in my invisibility, I took my time, stealthily creeping into the bedroom and standing by the wall. I probably needn’t have bothered. I doubt they would have noticed me if I’d been fully visible and wearing a Day-Glo safety vest.

The two girls were fairly pretty, a little older than my sister Tacoma. One girl had a mop of curly, chestnut-brown hair. She was a skinny thing, with small, bouncy breasts, not much bigger than my own. The other one was a little chunkier, almost Rubenesque. She was a redhead. They were both dwarfed by the bulk of my aunt and uncle. Uncle John was completely nude. He was splayed out in an easy chair by the bed, jerking off. He had salt-and-pepper pubes, and enormous hairy balls that jiggled and shifted as he masturbated.

Aunt Ellen was flat on her back on the bed. She was naked as well. She was fat, and she had truly immense breasts, and she had her face buried in the skinny girl’s hairless crotch. I could see the wetness, hear the squelching as she licked. The other girl was lying on her stomach, between Aunt Ellen’s monstrous thighs. She was still wearing her lilac panties, and she was busy licking my aunt’s pussy.

I stuck my hand inside my own pajamas, and ran my fingers up and down my slit. I was already sopping wet, and my clit was humming. I began to masturbate in earnest. It was difficult to whack off and stay invisible at the same time, and I may have flickered in and out a little, but like I said before, I don’t think it mattered. They certainly didn’t notice me. They had other things on their minds.

Aunt Ellen licked her fingers, and inserted two of them into the skinny brunette’s asshole. The girl grunted and grimaced, using her hands to spread her ass cheeks wider to give Aunt Ellen better access. Aunt Ellen craned her head, the veins in her neck sticking out, keeping her extended tongue on the girl’s juicy slit, while she finger-fucked her asshole. The girl who had been eating her out scrambled up, straddled her thick leg, and started dragging her pantied crotch back and forth along Aunt Ellen’s thigh. The two girls began kissing each other and playing with each other’s breasts.

Uncle John stood up (his back mostly to me, unfortunately), and started frantically jerking off. He made a sound like a tractor-trailer downshifting, and splattered his come all over the females on the bed. This seemed to set Aunt Ellen off, and she came, screeching like poorly-oiled machinery. I wondered why I’d never heard them before. The reason, I think, was the old house: thick plaster walls and timbers.

Aunt Ellen went to work on the two girl in a serious way, keeping her fingers crammed up inside the skinny one’s ass, she licked up the semen that had splashed across them; and then with both girls lying on their backs on the bed, she alternated licking their pussies, the skinny girls shaved and puffy vulva and lapping the bigger girl through the wet crotch of her panties. She licked and finger-fucked them until they both came.

That was just too much for me. I wanted to come like an overinflated balloon wants to pop. But one thing I couldn’t do was orgasm and stay invisible. It may be that they were too wrapped up in their own orgy to have even noticed me, but I wasn’t about to put that to the test. Pulling up my pajama bottoms (that had somehow crumbled down around my ankles), I gathered my canes and began the long, arduous journey back to my own bed, where I could finish the job properly. And that I did, masturbating until I was sore and silly.

I didn’t get another opportunity for a while, but when I did I jumped on it. I was in the kitchen one hot August afternoon, and looking back, I may have been invisible without realizing it. I had started doing that from time to time. Uncle John and Aunt Ellen walked through the room on their way out to the garden. Uncle John was wearing cut-off shorts that were cut off distressingly high and nothing else; Aunt Ellen was wearing a hideous floral summer dress that violated every known law of aesthetics and barely contained her huge breasts. As they passed, I heard Aunt Ellen say “…going to pick up your sweet little boy toy tonight…”

That was all I needed to hear.

I heard them leave this time. They were actually really quiet and discreet about it, tiptoeing out of the house after we had all gone to bed and not turning on their headlights until they had pulled out of the driveway, but I was listening for them, and I heard the front door click as it closed. I made my painfully slow way upstairs, let myself into Uncle John’s room, sat down on the easy chair, and settled down to wait.

As it happened, I barely had to wait at all.

They pulled into the driveway, and I hastily went invisible. I stood in a corner with my braces leaning up against the wall; the last thing I needed was for somebody to bump into me or accidentally sit on my lap.

The boy looked like a dark-hair Tintin with glasses. He was that cute! He looked like he was about my age, but I’m sure he was older than he appeared: my Aunt and Uncle may have been perverts, but I don’t think they were pedophiles; and he had a big Soviet sickle-and-hammer emblem tattooed across his hairless chest.

The scene this time was much slower and more languid than before. They all three got naked (Tintin had a nice, big, delicious-looking dick that was already hard and waggled as he moved), and smoked something sweet and sickly out of a funky glass pipe that made me a little light-headed. The three of them kissed a lot, sharing the smoke, which smelled like marijuana only more so, and touched each other. Tintin’s penis never flagged; Uncle John and Aunt Ellen seemed to make a point of not touching it, which only seemed to make it harder and more eagerly erect. Uncle John produced a big syringe full of yellow liquid; I hate needles and I flinched as I watched, but I couldn’t make myself look away. First he injected about half the syringe into his own arm, and then he changed needles and gave Tintin a shot in the inner thigh.

The boy looked disoriented, and Uncle John grinned and tweaked both his nipples, hard. Then Aunt Ellen fetched a vibrator that looked more like an industrial kitchen utensil than a sex toy, plugged it in, and turned down the lights. She sprawled out on the bed next to the guys, with the huge white vibrator humming between her thighs. Uncle John lay on his back, and Tintin lay on top of him, in a 69.

I had an absolutely gorgeous view of Uncle John with his head between Tintin’s thighs, licking and kissing and nibbling on that beautiful engorged cock. Every now and then he would divert himself by playing with the boy’s wrinkled ball sac or asshole, but mostly he just slurped at his cock like it was a particularly tasty gobstopper. I wished I could see what Tintin was doing to him, but all I could see was his unruly dark hair bobbing up and down between Uncle John’s thighs. I didn’t want to move around much to get a better view; I was afraid of getting caught.

They went at it for ages! I watched two hours tick by on the clock while they suckled each other and Aunt Ellen lazily masturbated next to them. My pussy was drenched: my juices were literally running down my thighs, and my clit hurt. Suddenly, without any warning whatsoever, Tintin squealed and came, squirting what I swear looked like several gallons of semen all over Uncle John’s red, chubby face.

Aunt Ellen laughed out loud. Uncle John, viscous white come still streaming down his cheeks, lips, nose, and forehead in sticky little rivulets, squirmed out from under young Tintin, got up on his knees, and vigorously jerked off into the boy’s open mouth.

Uncle John stood up, his fat balls swinging halfway down to his knees, went to the bathroom and washed his face and pissed, all with the door wide open. Aunt Ellen watched Tintin get dressed (I discovered that I adore watching a cute naked guy get dressed), got dressed herself, and took the rather dazed-looking fellow down to the truck. Presumably she gave him a ride home. Uncle John, meanwhile, went to bed.

It was torture getting out of that bedroom. Uncle John snored. The floorboards wanted to squeak under me. My cunt ached. Aunt Ellen had closed the door tight behind her. It took me half a century to gingerly tiptoe out into the hallway. Once I was finally safe, I couldn’t even wait to make it back to my own bedroom. I sat down at the top of the stairwell, spread my legs, and rubbed out a massive orgasm right there. I don’t know if I had ever come so powerfully before. It was the kind of orgasm that seemed to go on and on, like the perfect wave, curling my toes and making my nipples tingle. It made me wish I had a video camera so I could make a recording of myself coming, just so I could whack off to it again later on. Anyone who says girls don’t get off on visual imagery is insane in my book.

I didn’t spend all my time that summer indoors. Sometimes we went to the park, and we all went swimming a couple times, which was fun, and I did a little exploring of my own around the yard. It was just hard because of my mobility.

One night, when it was too hot and humid to sleep, I watched (invisible and from a safe distance) as Uncle John and Aunt Ellen strung a boy up from a twisted and gnarled old apple tree. They stripped him naked, bound his wrists, and hoisted him up until his feet kicked wildly a few inches above the grass. I don’t think it was the same boy as before; this one seemed a little fatter, and I didn’t see the communist sickle and hammer tattoo on his chest. Aunt Ellen and Uncle John took turns sucking his dick and whipping his backside with a willow branch. He howled like a coyote!

Finally, Aunt Ellen cut him down with a scary-looking rigger’s knife. He collapsed, and Uncle John pissed all over his face while Aunt Ellen cackled with laughter, jagged and uproarious. Then they watched while he jerked off, and I felt compelled to join him, curled up in the tall grass, one finger jammed up my asshole while I strummed my clit underneath ten thousand bright and merciless stars.

One hot and sultry day toward the end of August, they took me to the country fair. Ryan and Tacoma declined to go, so it was just the three of us. I had never been to anything like it, and I had a blast! It was a redneck freak show, a raucous anarchy of the senses. We ate sickly-sweet cotton candy and rode the Ferris wheel, and my whole body clenched with the thrill of it. I’ve never been comfortable with heights, and the construction seemed rickety at best. I thought there was a good chance I might die up there, but I didn’t.

The whole time, I felt like Uncle John and Aunt Ellen were on the verge of propositioning me, asking me to join them for some crazy kinky sex. The prospect set me on edge, twisted my stomach, made my pussy salivate and my clit swell and throb, and made me all jumpy and nervous. But there was no innuendo, neither one of them said anything in the least bit inappropriate or suggestive, and when they dropped me off at the farm late that afternoon (they both had faculty meetings at the college to attend, the new semester was getting ready to begin), I couldn’t decide if I was more disappointed or relieved.

On impulse, as their pickup truck pulled out of the driveway, I made my slow and jerky way out to the barn. I had the place to myself; Tacoma and Ryan were out and about. I didn’t have anything particular in mind other than some exploring, and possibly some out-of-doors masturbation. I had slipped my little ‘borrowed’ vibrator into my pants pocket that morning just in case I felt like having a little ‘quiet moment’, and now I thought might be the perfect time to indulge myself, in the quiet musty shade of the old barn.

I slipped in through the enormous barn door that didn’t close all the way, into the cavernous dark and shadowy interior.

As soon as I realized I wasn’t alone, I went invisible.

She was down on all fours on the dusty wooden floor, and he was behind her. They were fucking.

It was my sister Tacoma and my brother Ryan. I could hear them grunting, breathing hard. I could hear his cock squish-squelching in and out of her pussy. She was naked; he was wearing sandals and a white t-shirt.

Tacoma had bigger boobs than I had ever really realized. They hung down like a pair of fat, ripe cantaloupes. I watched, transfixed, as they fucked. My cunt was squishy and wet. I remember thinking ‘They should really be using a condom.’

Ryan pulled his dick out of Tacoma, and she mewed like a kitten. He had a nice-looking cock, not too big, with a well-defined head and a pronounced upward curve. His penis was shiny with Tacoma’s juices, and the crown was bright red and eager. They stood up and kissed, not like a brother and sister kiss, not at all.

Ryan put his hands above his head, Superman-style, and jumped. He did it casually, with no apparent effort. He jumped higher than should have been possible for anyone except maybe an Olympic high-jumper or an NBA star. He caught a rafter with both hands, and hung there, swinging slightly, his crotch right at Tacoma’s face level. I felt a powerful rush of jealousy as I watched, fingering my pussy; not just jealousy for the sex they were having, but jealousy for their able bodies and their agility.

While Ryan dangled from the beam, Tacoma popped the crown of his penis into her mouth, and clasped her hands together as if she was praying. Ryan kicked his legs as she ran her hands quickly up and down the shaft of his cock.

“I’m coming!” he wailed out. Tacoma let his cock pop out of her mouth, but her hands never stopped moving. His stomach tensed, and he squirted pearly-white come all over her tits. I wished I had breasts like that.

When he was all done, he dropped to the floor with a thunk. They kissed a little more, and he rubbed his semen like lotion all over Tacoma’s breasts. Then he pulled on his pants, and left.

She tossed her hair and stared searchingly all around the empty barn, making me flinch.

“I know you’re in here!”

I froze, hand crammed guiltily inside my panties. I concentrated as hard as I could on staying invisible, and tried not to breathe.

“You think you’re so sly, you invisible little skank! If you ever tell anyone—anyone—I’ll fucking kill you. You slimy little cunt, I swear to God, I’ll fucking murder you.” She bundled up her clothes, and stalked out of the barn.

A couple of miserable days went by. I avoided Tacoma as much as possible, and didn’t go invisible at all. Finally, when I couldn’t stand it any more, I pulled her aside and apologized.

“I’m sorry,” I said, “I shouldn’t have watched. I won’t tell anyone, I promise.”

“You shouldn’t use your powers to spy on people,” Tacoma said. “It’s really lame.”

“I’m sorry,” I said again. “I won’t do it again.”

“It’s OK,” Tacoma said, squeezing my hand. “Tell me though, did we look hot together?”

“You two looked really hot together.”

Tacoma smiled. “Good. Come out to the barn with me, I want to show you something.”

We walked together out to the barn. She was patient with my snail’s pace, which just made me feel all the more frustrated for being slow.

Once inside, she pointed to the rickety old ladder that led up to the hay loft. “Climb it,” she said. “Go ahead, don’t be scared. I’ll help.”

Climbing that horrible old ladder was the most terrifying thing I’ve ever done in my life. Tacoma helped me though, guiding my legs and holding my feet and talking soothingly to me the whole time. It felt like it took hours, but we finally made it up into the loft. I was covered in sweat, and I felt like puking.

Tacoma wasn’t even out of breath. She stepped lightly over to the edge. Just watching her do that made me dizzy. “Stop it,” I said. “Come back!”

“Watch this,” Tacoma said, and she stepped casually off the edge of the hayloft, out into space.

I started to scream, but instead of plunging the twenty feet down to the floor and shattering her femur or breaking her back, Tacoma just hovered there, like a graceful, long-legged dragonfly.

“I can fly,” she said with a secret little smile. “You can too. Go ahead, try it!”

I shuffled hesitantly closer to the edge. Tacoma took my hand in hers. I swallowed hard, mouth dry as dust, and stepped out into the abyss.

END

Comments (10)

Vinegar Pie

I arrived at college a virgin. I would stay that way for the next four years and then some, all the way through undergrad school and beyond, out into the big bad world; but I did have some interesting times along the way.

I took a taxi from the airport. It was August, and I remember being oppressed by the unfamiliar heat and humidity. The cab driver dropped me and my luggage off in front of the dorms. The campus seemed huge and aloof, and I didn’t know anybody there. I was determined not to be intimidated. I took a slow, creaky elevator to the sixth floor (even floor were for girls, odd-numbered floors housed guys) and located my room.

I opened the door, and that was when I met Carla for the first time. At that moment all I could think was that I was so glad that my mother hadn’t accompanied me to help me get settled in, as she had threatened.

My roommate was perched on the bottom bunk of her bed, naked except for a scarlet pair of panties, the kind that my mother was convinced was the Devil’s own handiwork. She had fairly enormous breasts, and a mouth full of cock. There was a guy, a naked guy, reclining on her mattress, and Carla was busy sucking his dick. She looked up at me, the livid red crown of his cock captured between her teeth like a small animal in a snare, and she fluttered her fingers in an ‘Oh, hi there!’ gesture. I stood in the doorway and gaped.

Another, more prudish virgin might have run away screaming, gone weeping to the RA. Someone more discreet than me might have gone for a long walk around campus, and come back in half an hour or so. I may have been a virgin, but I was neither prudish nor especially discreet. I walked into the room, trailing my suitcases behind me, and sat down on my own bed to watch the show.

Inexperienced as I was, I figured out pretty quickly that this wasn’t standard blowjob procedure. For one thing, Carla was certainly taking her time about it! The whole event lasted well over two hours: it was about 3 o’clock when I blithely walked into our dorm room; it was after 5 when she finally let him shoot off. And I don’t know how long she’d been working on him before I showed up.

Sometimes she actually sucked his dick, but most of the time she just toyed with it, like a big lazy cat with a wounded mouse. She would lick it, slowly savoring it, as if she were licking a popsicle on a hot summer day; she would stroke his length with her fingertips, up and down, back and forth; she would play with his balls, kissing and slurping at his wrinkly scrotum; sometimes she would slap his cock around, making it sproing from side to side; sometimes she would drag her tits all the way from his balls up to his chin; and sometimes she would pull back, purse her lips, and simply blow on his cock.

Even I knew that a blowjob wasn’t really supposed to include actual blowing.

The guy, whoever he was (I never saw him again and never heard his name) may have taken all this lying down, but he sure didn’t take it quietly. I’m not sure two coherent words come out of his mouth the whole time Carla was blowing him, but that didn’t mean he was silent. On the contrary, he never shut up; hissing and spitting and sputtering like a tea pot boiling over. About the only time he was quiet was when Carla jammed one of her big round boobs into his mouth. That shut him up.

He had a pretty big dick. Later that semester I would see even bigger ones, but his was plenty big. And it was fat and swollen and slick with saliva and over-excited and angry-looking. It was the first one I had ever seen, up close and personal. I wasn’t entirely sure what to make of it. I wasn’t entirely sure what I was supposed to make of my roommate: at one point she had a finger up inside the guy’s asshole, and was vigorously butt-fucking him, which made her large breasts shake like wrecking balls. What I did know was that my pussy was soaking wet.

She withdrew her index finger from the guy’s butthole. He grunted. She pushed his hairy thighs apart and dropped her open mouth onto his erection. She bobbed her head up and down five or six times in rapid succession, then sat up straight, leaving his cock wet and waggling, pointed at the ceiling. He made a strange little noise deep in the back of his throat, kind of like the mewing of a kitten but more guttural. Then his cock twitched, and he shot off. It was beautiful to watch. There was a shockingly large amount of semen, white and pearlescent, and it squirted up in a ballistic arc, splashing down all over his flat, furry tummy.

He got dressed, looking a lot like a wilted flower, and left without a word. He must have known I was in the room, but he never acknowledged me. That proved to be pretty standard behavior.

“Hi, I’m Carla, I’m your roommate!” This I knew already. She made no move to cover up. Her boobs were fairly huge—she made me look positively flat-chested. They weren’t porn star boobies though. They were a little saggy, and had enormous brown areolae, and thick nipples with stray hairs around them.

“Hi,” I said. “It’s, um, nice to meet you.” My panties were drenched and squelchy inside my jeans. I was all sweaty, and it wasn’t just the southern heat of late summer.

“I’m going to masturbate now,” Carla informed me, sitting back down on her bed, facing me. The part she left unspoken was ‘If you don’t mind…’ Fortunately I didn’t mind.

I was curious to see her pussy, but I didn’t get to, not that time. Carla produced a small, silver bullet-shaped vibrator from somewhere, and pressed it against the front of her sinful panties. The little toy hummed with an obnoxiously loud whine, like a dying air-conditioner. Carla pressed it hard against her crotch, and bit down on her lower lip.

“I think I’m going to masturbate too,” I said hesitantly. I had been furtively and guiltily whacking off since middle school, once a day if not more, but I had never ever admitted the fact that I did such a thing. And I’d certainly never done it with someone else in the room. Never mind with someone watching.

And Carla was watching. She didn’t even pretend not to. She grinned and stared, and worked her noisy little toy even harder up and down the front of her scandalous red panties. Dark hairs peeked out to either side of those panties, and I was dying with curiosity to see what was going on inside them.

Feeling equal parts deeply self-conscious and molar-gnashingly horny, I stepped out of my jeans and pulled down my own boring white panties.

I didn’t think I was anything special to watch. I had my technique down. I almost always did it the same way: on my knees, head down, two fingers up inside me, and my hand scrunched up so that the heel of my hand was pressed up against my clitoris. I was already ridiculously excited, and knowing that Carla was watching just made it all that much more intense. I came quick, and God I came hard! Then I turned my head, fingers still buried in my juicy twat, and watched Carla grind her way through a big fat orgasm of her own. College, I decided, was going to be pretty interesting.

We never talked about this stuff, you understand. Carla and I got along pretty well as roommates—neither of us was too slovenly, too neat, or too loud. We respected each other’s things and hung out sometimes, but we never became best friends or anything. The only weird thing was the boys: Carla brought home at least two or three a week. It was never the same guy twice, and I rarely caught his name. I, on the other hand, never brought any boys home.

I still don’t know how Carla did it. She wasn’t really all that attractive. She had kind of a pear-shaped build, and she wore too much makeup. Maybe it was her big tits. Or maybe she was just brazen. Either way, it worked, and I got to reap the voyeuristic benefits.

She wanted to fuck me. She made that clear, from day two. She even told me so.

I slept late that next morning, and when I woke up her bed was empty. Carla came back an hour or so later. I was still wearing my pajamas, drinking orange juice, checking my email, and browsing my morning pornography. She startled me when she walked in through the door, and I quickly snapped closed my laptop.

“I’d really like to fuck you,” she said.

I didn’t know what to say to that. “Thank you,” I said. She said the same thing two or three times over the course of the semester, and I never really knew how to respond.

Carla only very rarely fucked the boys she brought home. Actually, they could consider themselves lucky if they even got to come at all.

She had another guy over a few days later. He was pretty cute; not really my cup of tea, but then again at the time I wasn’t sure I even had a cup of tea. Anyway, they came stumbling and laughing into the room, both of them quite drunk. They were kissing, and the clothes quickly went flying off.

He had a lovely body, and I stared unabashedly. I wasn’t yet used to the sight of naked male flesh right there in my dorm room. It was also the first time, and one of the rare times, that I actually got to see Carla naked. I think she may have been self-conscious about her pussy: she had prominent, meaty labia that hung down below her plump outer lips. Hers did not look like a porn star pussy. But that doesn’t mean I didn’t think it was beautiful.

Anyway, this afternoon she was too drunk and/or horny to care, so off came the panties, and Carla lay down on her back on the cold hard tiles of our dorm room floor. Her guy promptly got down between her thighs, lying on his belly, and started noisily and enthusiastically licking.

I thought this was way hot. Having a guy, a cute, hot, naked guy go down on me was my #2, maybe my #3 fantasy at the time. Watching this dude, his tight naked butt wiggling, his shoulders flexing, slurping away at Carla’s pussy made me instantly, insanely horny.  I got down on my knees, making sure to position myself so I had a good view of the action. I hiked up my skirt, pulled down my panties, and let my fingers do the walking. Already, I was losing any inhibitions about masturbating in front of other people.

It was really sexy to watch. And to listen to. Dude was really into it. He made Clara come at least twice, maybe three times. The sweat beaded up on his back and ran down his spine. Clara pulled his hair viciously, and when she came, she squeezed his head tight between her thick thighs, letting the whole dorm know, loud and clear, that she was enjoying the ride.

Finally, she pushed him away. He was breathing hard, and his face was red and flushed and slick with her juices. His cock jutted eagerly out, quiveringly hard. I never ever got sick of seeing hard dicks bouncing around our dorm room.

“That’ll be all. Get lost,” Carla told him as she tugged her panties back on.

“What?!”

“Did I stutter? Get dressed and get the hell out of here.” I couldn’t believe it either.

“What am I supposed to do with this?”

“I don’t care. Jerk off, I suppose. In the privacy of your own room.”

I was flabbergasted. What a waste! The guy sullenly got dressed and slunk out of our dorm, and I never stopped masturbating. At that moment, if Carla had offered, I almost certainly would have let her fuck me. But she didn’t pounce. She was already getting dressed; headed off, I suppose, in search of new prey.

Carla was mean to her boys. She loved to torture and torment them. She would pull their nipples like she was trying to rip them straight off their chest. She would yank their hair mercilessly, grind herself all over their faces, not caring whether they could breathe, or if they ever got to get off. I once watched her piss on a guys face while he was in the middle of eating her out; she howled with laughter, and he stayed with her all the way. She loved to have sex with guys while she was menstruating, just to see the expression on the guy’s face when she reached into her panties and pulled out a bloody tampon. “Dive in!” she’d command him with a smirk.  And usually they would.

I never understood her proclivities; I certainly never adopted them myself. Actually, later on when I was out of college and had a sex life all my own, I was just the opposite. I liked it when a guy was a little aggressive, when he’d take control, get caught up in his own desires, use me for his pleasure. But watching Carla do her thing definitely turned my crank, something fierce.

Carla bought me a vibrator. It was a beautiful, expensive one: baby blue silicone with interesting ridges and a saucy arching curve. I took the hint, but I didn’t take her up on it. I did take the vibrator though. It was a revelation, the best thing since I’d first discovered pornography! From that day on, I was never without at least one.

Along with her silver bullet, Carla owned a big black dildo. I was never tempted to borrow it; it was scary big, a parody of a real cock. If she masturbated with it, I never caught her doing so. I did, however, get to watch her fuck a boy with it.

Possibly to Carla’s consternation, he didn’t seem to mind one bit. The harder she fucked him with it, the harder he humped back against her, balls jiggling, and his erect cock smacking audibly against his own tummy like a jib flapping in a gale. They sounded like a pair of jaguars going at it, snarling and hissing and snapping and yowling. When he came, it was one of the most intense male orgasms I’ve ever witnessed.

By the time Carla removed her oversized dildo from the guy’s poor, tired asshole, I had already given myself one orgasm, and was working on a second. I had three fingers crammed up my twat, and my vibrator was humming away pressed against my clitoris. They watched me masturbate, the guy curled up naked on the bottom half of my roommate’s bunk bed, and Carla loitering sardonically next to my own bed,  still wearing the dildo strapped on over her purple panties.

“I could do it to you too, you know.” she said, and that was all it took to push me over the edge into another wailing, toe-curling orgasm. I never seriously considered taking her up on her offer; maybe if her dildo hadn’t been the size of my forearm… maybe. In any event, it would be another ten years before I sampled anal sex, and discovered to my surprise that under the right circumstances, and with plenty of lube, I absolutely adored it.

Carla was a beast. She brought home a guy I recognized from my History survey class, a bit of a jock I thought, a football player wanna-be. They made out for a while on Carla’s bottom bunk while I watched, by this time completely unfazed. I just wanted to see his dick.

Then Carla broke off the kiss. She asked the guy if he wanted a blowjob. Of course he said ‘Yes’. She informed him that she’d be happy to suck his dick, but that if she was going to do that, she got to whip him first. He agreed, a little hesitantly.

Carla had him strip out of his shirt, and handcuffed his wrists together. She snatched a pair of her dirty panties out of her laundry bag, and stuffed them into his mouth, and tied the bundle shut with a bandanna. His eyes were big and brown and wide and full of fear. “What have I gotten myself into?” It was hot. Carla stood him up and turned him around so that he was facing away from me. She tied his handcuffs to the top of her bunk bed. He had nice muscular shoulders and a cute little butt, and I couldn’t wait to see it naked. Then she produced a length of thick hemp rope she’d pillaged from the theatre department, and proceeded to whip him something awful.

I didn’t count, but I’m certain she gave him upwards of twenty lashes. Maybe fifty, I don’t know. By the time she was done, the rope was frayed and stained red, he was hanging limply from the handcuffs, which were cutting cruelly into his wrists, and his back was a bloody mess. It looked like raw hamburger. Carla uncuffed him, and removed her panties from his mouth. He spat dryly. Carla was breathing hard. She had worked up quite a sweat. She tittered and asked if he still wanted that blowjob.

“No thanks.” He gingerly pulled his t-shirt back on. “You rancid fucking cunt,” he said conversationally. Then he left.

The really fucked-up thing was that I was sopping wet.

Another guy she brought home, she fucked cowgirl-style, him flat on his back, right there on her bed, with no preliminaries. She tugged his pants and underwear down, pulled her own panties to one side, rolled a condom on, and rode him while I watched. She punched him while she bounced up and down on his cock, wailing on him like he was a punching bag, her clenched fists pummeling his face, chest, and stomach. She busted his nose, and blood sprayed everywhere. Eventually, he just squirmed out from under her and left, still naked, his clothes in a bundle under one arm, holding a hand to his face, his cock still erect and condom-wrapped.

Once she brought a guy home, and started in with her marathon-blowjob treatment, teasing and tormenting his cock while I watched and lazily touched myself. I knew that this was likely to last for hours, and I was pacing myself. He kept begging her, incessantly whining and wheedling to let him fuck her. Finally Carla had had enough.

“Stand up,” she said, “I want to do something special for you.”

He stood up, wet dick pointing eagerly at the ceiling. “Spread you legs,” Carla said, “put your hands behind your head. Now close your eyes…”

I watched from my kneeling position on my bed, running my fingers up and down my slippery slit, knowing what was coming and not even believing what I was about to see.

Carla didn’t even hesitate. In one smooth motion, as if she were attempting a field goal from the 35 yard line, she kicked him hard in the balls.

It made a sound like a baseball bat hitting a watermelon. He went down, hard, like all his bones had come unstrung. He lay on the floor, curled up in a fetal ball, dry-heaving and weeping.

That was the closest Carla and I ever came to getting it on. The guy was still curled up on the floor, making noises like a sow in labor. “Fuuuuck… God-Damnit… Fuuuuck…” he moaned in between retching. Carla tittered. I got up, stepping gingerly around the guy’s prone and twitching body, crawled into Carla’s bed and lay down on top of her. Carla felt big and soft and warm underneath me. Her large breasts were pressed up against my own. My pussy was soaking wet. I slipped my fingers into my cunt and rubbed my tits against Carla’s breasts. She had one hand inside her own panties, and one hand on my ass, pulling me closer to her. We kissed as we masturbated. I had never kissed a girl before—I had barely even kissed a guy before—and I thought it was super hot. I wished I was a guy, and I could squirt all over the expanse of her belly. I wished her panties were off and it was my hand on her pussy. I wished it was her tongue on my clitoris. I kept picturing the triumphant look on Carla’s face as she smashed that poor guy’s testicles, and I kept getting hotter and more turned on.

We both came at about the same time. As I orgasmed, Carla twisted my tit like she was wringing out a dish towel, and bit down my lip hard enough to draw blood. That seemed to set her off. She threw her head back and howled, tearing at my lip. Later on I had to go to the emergency room and get three stitches; I still have a tiny scar.

By the time we had both settled down, the guy was gone. I don’t know when he had left, or whether Carla had done permanent damage to his testicles, and I can’t really say that I cared. Carla took a shower while I held an icepack to my lip, which wouldn’t stop bleeding.

The next day I went to the RA and requested a new roommate, and I ended up with Michelle, who was quiet and inoffensive. We got along fine. She was a little too neat and tidy for my taste, and rather boring, but that was OK. If Michelle had any sexual thoughts whatsoever, she kept them strictly to herself. Carla and I remained smile-and-wave friendly around campus, but that was all. We didn’t talk or hang out or anything, and by and large I was OK with that too.

I graduated from college, virginity dented but still intact, and moved to New York City, where I pursued my literary career with a vengeance. I lost that pesky virginity of mine to a very sweet Guatemalan boy who had incredible stamina and no idea that he was plucking my cherry.

Shortly after that, I got involved with a pair of brothers, twins actually. Adam picked me up in a bookstore. I was flipping through the erotica section, and he came boldly up to me and asked if I could recommend anything sexy. He was beautiful; tall and winsome with sad brown eyes and unruly hair and strong, clever hands. I was feeling brave and saucy.

“How about me?” I said, “I’m an open book.”

“I’m not looking for a relationship,” he said.

“Neither am I,” I told him.

So I had my first ever one-night stand with Adam, and it was awesome. He was kind and smart and funny, and a wildcat in bed. And he was hung. I went back to his place, a claustrophobic two-bedroom apartment deep in Queens, strewn with sketch pads, drawings, and art supplies. We went straight to bed. I sucked him, he ate me out, we fucked; we slept a few hours, and did it all over again. I woke up in his bed the next morning, feeling sore, a little groggy, slightly disoriented, and very very satisfied. He had gotten up early and had already made coffee.

Adam asked me if I’d be interested in having a threesome with him and his twin brother. I surprised myself by answering “Yes!” without even hesitating. I guess that was Bryan’s cue: he came out of his bedroom wearing nothing but a pair of striped boxers with a delightful-looking lump in the front of them. They were identical twins: I already knew exactly what those boxer shorts contained.

We did it the first time right there in the middle of breakfast. The boys sat on the edge of their coffee table, and I sucked them off, alternating one cock and then the other, and sometimes both at the same time, until they both shot off all over my tits. My pussy was too sore for more fucking right away, but Bryan ate me out while I lay on top of Adam, feeling his cock get hard all over again nestled in between my buttocks. After that I was treated to the sight of the twin brothers kissing and jerking each other off, and I knew that I had hit jackpot.

We were together for over a year. I won’t say I dated them, because there was never any pretense that it was about anything but sex; but they were both very sweet, and the sex was fantastic

What they both really wanted was to make a sandwich out of me; one twin taking me anally while the other one fucked my pussy. I was deeply intrigued, but they weren’t pushy about it, and I was too chicken to give them the green light. In retrospect, I kick myself for passing up on that action, and now I wish they’d been just a tinier bit pushier.

But aside from that, we did just about everything else that three horny people can do together. We experimented freely. I loved to suck them both off, alternating dicks or taking both erections into my mouth. I drank their urine straight from the source, which I was surprised to find neither degrading nor disgusting, but rather shockingly intimate. I got to watch them fuck other girls (one of them at a time—taking both twins at once was a pleasure I reserved for myself). They loved to eat me out, and they’d do so for hours on end; one twin licking my pussy and clit, while the other one tongued and probed my anus. Once I got over being self-conscious about that, it was heaven.  I really enjoyed watching the two of them fool around with each other too; I loved watching them suck each other’s dicks and how loud and excited they’d get before they came. They were beautiful to watch.

One jagged, psychedelic night when we were all three tripping on mescaline, I got to watch Bryan fuck Adam up the ass. He greased up his cock, wrapped his belt around his brother’s neck, and crammed his dick right up Adam’s anus. Bryan yanked on the belt, choking Adam until his eyes bulged out and he choked and retched, and sodomized him like he was driving nails, howling like a cowboy the whole time. I had my mouth on Adam’s dick, and I sucked him through the whole ride, and both brothers came at the same time, Adam filling my mouth with his sweet, sticky jizz just as Bryan snarled and cursed and came in his asshole. That may have been the single hottest event I’ve ever witnessed.

Our standard operating procedure however was more pedestrian. I would suck one brother’s cock while the other one fucked me from behind; and then they would switch places, and then switch again, until all three of us had come at least once. Life was good. I couldn’t believe my luck. It only ended because Bryan went and fell in love and got himself a fiancé and declared himself off limits. Me and Adam continued fucking for a little while after that, but the dynamic had shifted, and it just wasn’t the same. I cried when it was all over, even though I had promised myself that I wouldn’t.

I had a couple of same-sex experiences too. The first was a banal craigslist hookup; an awkward and utterly forgettable drunken grope-fest. We were both really horny and really nervous, but aside from that we had absolutely nothing in common. I felt no attraction toward her whatsoever, but I fucked her anyway, and felt like a dirty ashtray the next morning and had a belly ache and pangs of regret for days after. I swore I’d never do anything of the sort ever again.

My second experience with a girl rocked me to the core, and almost convinced me to switch teams for good.

Sue was a co-worker, nominally my supervisor, but we worked together like partners. We always had good chemistry, but what transpired was completely unplanned, and unfolded organically. We were working late in the office together, and the sexual electricity was crackling between us like static on flannel sheets. A look turned into a touch, and suddenly we were kissing.

“I’d really like to fuck you,” I said.

We took a taxi back to her place, a doorman building on the Upper West Side.

Sue’s place made mine look like a broom closet, a messy broom closet at that. As soon as the door closed behind us, we started kissing again. Clothes came off like falling leaves as we tumbled into her bed. Sweet smelling, freshly washed high-thread count sheets! I got my hand inside her black slack, and found her sopping wet. The last of our clothes were soon piled on the floor, and we were kissing and touching on her bed.

“I want to taste you,” I said. Sue rolled over on her back and spread her legs wide. Her pussy was shaved, as I suppose is fashionable these days. I thought of Carla and her furry muff and thick, pouting lips. Sue’s pussy was petite, and her clitoris was pink and eager. I dived on in.

It wasn’t my first time going down on a girl; ms. craigslist had taken care of that for me. As uninspiring as that first experience had been, I’m glad I had it: this time I had a modicum of a clue what to do while I was down there. I thoroughly enjoyed licking Sue’s pussy, and from the sound of things, and all the wetness, she enjoyed having her kitty licked. I made her come, which made me absolutely glow.

I came up for air, and we kissed a while more. Then Sue’s fingers found my pussy, and then she went down on me, and then we maneuvered into a 69.

In my post-collegiate explorations with guys, I had tried 69 a few times, and decided I didn’t like it. Too distracting, kind of awkward. Somebody inevitably got shortchanged, usually me. 69ing with a girl, or at least with Sue, was a different experience entirely. It was a long, slow, sultry journey, a sexual conversation, a game of give-and-take that seemed to last for hours, bring us both repeatedly to the brink before backing off, tiptoeing away from climax. It felt like we were dancing. I was covered in Sue’s juices, positively soaked. She was on top of me, and when I slipped a finger up her tiny asshole, my thumb into her pussy, and pressed my tongue against her clit, she finally came for me, burying her face in my own cunt, which sent me off like TNT.

It was late. Or rather, early. We kissed and cuddled a little more. I wanted to spend the remainder of the night there, but she seemed uncomfortable, so I left, wired and tired on a four a.m. train to Brooklyn.

At the office the next day, things were palpably awkward. We were both exquisitely polite to each other, like a pair of prizefighters tiptoeing through a tchotchke shop.

I made a bit of an ass of myself over the next week or two, trying to turn a one-night stand into a relationship. Sue clearly wasn’t interested, but couldn’t quite come right out and say so, and I wasn’t in any state to take a hint. Some things are best left alone.

Fortunately I was a freelancer, and my work situation moved on, and Sue and I left things with an empty hug and a promise to keep in touch.

For a while I was obsessed with Sue. Whenever I’d masturbate, I would think of her. I’d imagine her beating my ass raw; yanking my hair; cruelly twisting my nipples; pissing into my mouth; fucking my ass with a big black strap-on; shoving her whole fist up my cunt, and I’d come, howling into the pillow, my vibrator humming its long monotone against my frustrated clit. After a while I moved on, but I still use Sue for some of my kinkier masturbatory imaginings.

I still think of Carla from time to time, usually when I’m home in bed and feeling restless and horny and all alone. I wonder where she is now, how she turned out. Sometimes I wonder what it would have been like if I’d let her fuck me, back in the Wonderland of my early twenties, when everything was a possibility. I think, once in a while, about looking her up. And then I think of that boy, writhing and puking in pain on our dorm room floor, clutching his bruised and damaged testicles, and I think about how wet it made me. And then I masturbate myself to sleep and let it go.

END

Comments (6)

The Continuing Adventures of the Devirginator

The Devirginator makes her entrance through the second-story bedroom window. Perched on the sill, backlit by the rising moon, she must look like a full-page panel straight out of a graphic novel. Or at least that was the intention. Her purple cape billows and flaps dramatically in the night breeze. Her breasts are supported by a shocking-red strapless bra, the kind that works so much better in theory than in practice, and she is wearing a matching pair of skimpy, butt-floss style panties that her alter-ego wouldn’t be caught dead in. On her feet are sequined red rock-climbing slippers, with modified racecar rubber for soles, and her face is obscured by a red feathered masquerade ball mask.

In the soft moonlight, the sleeping boy on the bed looks like a cherub. If she hadn’t known his actual age—22—the Devirginator might have mistaken him for a prepubescent child. But then he rolls over onto his back, still mostly asleep, pushing the blankets away, and the illusion is shattered. Ben always sleeps in the nude.

The Devirginator sees a lot of naked young men in her line of work. Typically they are not the most conventionally attractive specimens. They tend to be overweight, underweight, and/or have grooming issues. Not that she is complaining. She isn’t. The Devirginator loves them all. But this one is an entirely different kind of Ken doll. He has the body of an athlete, the wholesome good looks of an Eagle Scout. As a matter of fact, the Devirginator knows that he played high school football, and that he was something of a sensation as a quarterback at his small Christian school. His body looks like it could have been chiseled out of marble by a classic Greek sculptor. A rather horny and perverted old goat of a sculptor: young Ben is sporting quite an impressive erection.

He half-sits up in bed. “I didn’t think you’d really come,” he whispers.

The Devirginator puts one finger to her lips, miming a ‘Shush’. Ben’s parents are watching TV downstairs. She shinned past them when she climbed the drain pipe. The Devirginator hops down from the window sill, and more-or-less elegantly slips out of her sequined red climbing shoes. The strapless brassiere has fallen down of its own accord, as it tends to in these situations. Her boobs are not particularly large, and appear somewhat asymmetrical when unrestrained.

She climbs up onto the bed and straddles him. His dick is rubbing delectably up against the front of her scarlet panties. She kisses his lips, and he kisses her right back, with an eagerness and candor that almost takes her breath away. Her pussy is drooling with anticipatory lust. This is going to be great. She takes his hand, a big strong soft paw, and guides it to her breast. His stomach is flat and hard, with a soft fuzzy treasure-trail leading south from his navel. His balls are thick and heavy. His cock is leaking slick fluid onto her thighs, agonizingly close to her crotch. Her clit is pounding like a big bass drum.

She reaches down between her legs, and takes him in hand. He feels even bigger than he looks. His cock is hot and hard and eager and alive. She pulls her panties to one side and guides him toward the target. Her cunt is wet and slippery and open and slaveringly hungry. Her clit is thumping along in time with her pounding heart. She is really going to enjoy plucking this one.

Ben jerks away from her, breaks off the kiss. “No,” he says. “Stop, please. No.”

“No?” She lifts herself up, poised to pounce, ready to engulf him in one fell swoop.

“No… I’m just not ready.”

The Devirginator fumbles her shoes back on, and leaves the same way she got in, though the window. Her stupid strapless bra is all askew and her panties are annoyingly wet and crawling up her butt something fierce. She slides down the drain pipe in a bit of a snit, past his parents watching reruns, and wraps herself in her purple cape once she reaches the ground. She climbs into her little grey Toyota and drives off into the night. She has other fish to fry.

She bangs on the door of Tony’s apartment. The Devirginator carries a lock pick kit in her car, but right now she just isn’t in the mood to diddle around with torsion wrenches and tumblers. Looking quizzical and sleep-deprived, Tony answers the door, an open bag of Doritos dangling from one hand. He is wearing a Dragon magazine t-shirt and grey sweat pants. She pushes past the threshold into his combined living room/bedroom, pressing her body up against him, nibbling and kissing his lips, ignoring his questions and protests. The half-eaten bag of chips falls onto the floor and the door swings shut behind them.

True to form, Tony was on his computer playing Dungeon Crawl or something of that sort. The boy has a possibly unhealthy addiction to obsolete D&D style video games from the 1980s. The Devirginator, or rather her alter-ego, found him leafing through diskettes in the back of a dingy gaming store at the mall. One glance and she knew he was just her type.

Her hand slips down the front of his grey sweat pants, past his tighty-whities. He is already hard. This is promising. He’s not hung like a python, but he’s no mini either, and anyway the Devirginator doesn’t put much stock in metrics like size. She’s in it for the whole experience.

He tastes like sour sweat, Diet Coke, and Doritos. “You,” she says in a voice that brooks no argument, “into the shower. Now.”

Never taking his wide, innocent, slightly bloodshot brown eyes off of her, Tony strips out of his clothes, and turns on the water. On another guy, the extra weight Tony carries wouldn’t be troublesome. It might even be fetching, in a cute-and-cuddly teddy bear sort of way. On Tony though, it just looks like flab. Lack of muscle tone and sketchy posture and a pale complexion don’t help, but the problem runs deeper. What Tony lacks is confidence. Boy should get out more often. If he ever wants to get laid.

The Devirginator has ditched her shoes, cape, and panties, as well as the retarded bra. He watches her all the time he is in the shower. He’s probably afraid that if he blinks she will disappear like a djinn, evaporating into whatever bottle she came out of. He doesn’t need to worry. The Devirginator is going nowhere. After he has rinsed the soap suds off, she reaches in and turns off the water. No sense in ruining her red feathered masquerade ball mask. Damn thing was expensive.

She climbs into the bathtub with him, sits her butt on the edge of the tub, and gets down to the business of sucking his dick. Now that he is soapy-clean, she savors it. He hasn’t had this pleasure, he once told her (or more correctly, this is what he told the plain-clothes daytime version of herself when they ate mozzarella sticks at the food court) since he was fourteen, at camp. And that was a botched job.

The Devirginator is very good at this, and she knows it. She plays Tony like a maestro conducting an orchestra, simultaneously pushing his buttons and his limits, bringing him micrometers from the edge and then deftly backing off. She pulls out her entire toolkit for this one, stimulating his cock, balls, perineum, and anus with lips, tongue, and fingers. Long before she is ready to move on to Act II, he is wailing and moaning, begging for release. It is deeply gratifying.

At last, it becomes clear that Tony cannot be toyed with any longer. He is a bottle of nitroglycerin that has been shaken as much as it can be shook. Somewhat regretfully, the Devirginator disengages. Her mouth is tired, but happy. They clamber out of the bathtub, partly in the interest of safety and comfort, and partly to give poor over-excited Tony a few moments of cooling-off time. He towels off, his engorged cock wagging proudly as he dries his body. They leave the bathroom and tumble onto his disreputable futon couch. When was the last time he changed those sheets? The Devirginator doesn’t even want to know.

She straddles him. This is her preferred position for situations like this. She grasps his cock, points it directly at her aching, needy cunt. She didn’t even make him put on a condom. She will kick herself for this later, but this time the gamble pays off.

“Are you ready?” she asks. It is strictly a pro forma question. He grunts in ascent, nods eagerly, and she slowly, deliberately lowers herself onto him, giddily savoring every brief second of it.

Even with her on top, in control of pace and penetration, he won’t last long. Three, maybe four squishy, squelchy ins-and-outs, and then it is all over. This is all fine. She is enjoying herself immensely. Later on, she will masturbate to this scene, playing it all back in her head. Then she will get her orgasm. For now it is all about him.

She feels him slip past the point of no return, even as he croaks out “I’m coming!” She plunges down on him, rocking her hips and grinding herself into his fluffy pubes, his entire length and girth buried inside her as his cock swells, pulses, spasms, and ultimately explodes, pumping an immodest amount of semen straight into her pussy. The come leaks copiously out of her as she extracts herself—no post-coital cuddling for the Devirginator—and they are both left slightly stunned, sweaty, half-dazed and out of breath.

The Devirginator recovers first. Of course she does. She has infinitely more experience than Tony does. He is still blinking like an oversized Hobbit as she collects her things, wraps herself up in her purple cape, and exits the way she came in, through the door. Then it is into the Toyota and off to home base. It is late, and there is a hot shower, a cold beer, a dildo, and fresh AAs in her vibrator waiting for her. On the whole, it was a successful night, she tells herself. But it is only a half-truth, and she is irritated. The Devirginator hates to be rebuffed.

*

The Devirginator’s alter-ego spends a lot of time hanging out in gaming shops, off-label coffee houses, used book stores, and the like. She took an evening Calculus course at the local community college partly for professional development, and partly because it seemed like an ideal hunting ground.

Her looks are unremarkable. She is chunky without being overweight, friendly without being intimidating, neither quiet nor outspoken, and rather plain-looking. Or if you are feeling ungenerous, slightly homely. Over the years, she has gotten quite good at picking out her boys, and at steering the conversation toward the topic that most concerns her: their virginity. Call it her superpower. The Devirginator is, for better or for worse, me.

I never in a million years would have picked out Ben as a low-hanging fruit of the unplucked variety. He sat next to me in Calc, right up in front. He was simply too good looking, in a blonde and chiseled All American sort of way. I immediately assumed that he had a girlfriend, or girlfriends, and I figured he was probably lousy in bed anyway. I ignored him and spent my time in class sizing up the other prospects. Of which there were many.

I probably never even would have even spoken to him if he hadn’t spoken to me first. He asked me in class about a homework problem, and I jumped as if stung. I didn’t know the answer either. Calculus is hard, and it had been years and years since I had last had a math class. We agreed to make a study date, and if I didn’t exactly think nothing more of it, I certainly didn’t get my hopes up either.

We met up the next afternoon, an hour or so before class, in the sterile and depressingly stark school cafeteria. We worked on our homework together, and it actually helped. More out of habit than anything, I maneuvered the conversation towards sex. I was flabbergasted when he told me.

He actually blushed. It was cute. It was a problem, he said, and he had no idea how to go about getting rid of it.

“Why?” I asked. Why hadn’t he taken the plunge when he was a high school football star with his pick of the cheerleading squad?

“Religious convictions,” he said.

And what changed? Why did he suddenly want to ditch his V-card now that he was single, grown-up, and gainfully under-employed?

“Disillusionment,” he told me.

What makes a person a virgin, or not a virgin? It’s a slippery, thorny question, but Ben’s answer was straightforward. “A penis in a vagina,” he said. Oh, so he’d had other kinds of sex, anal or oral, but still considered himself a virgin? He blushed furiously. No, his high school girlfriend had had religious convictions too. The furthest they’d gone was some remarkably chaste necking and petting in the back seat of his Daddy’s minivan.

We settled back into homework. A big part of the art that I practice is in knowing when to back off, knowing when to not push too hard on a sensitive subject. But I was already scheming away like a mad scientist. I wanted to push Ben’s buttons in the worst kind of way.

*

The next time the Devirginator enters though Ben’s bedroom window, he is waiting for her.

“Are you ready this time?” she asks.

“No, I don’t think so,” he says, and she is OK with that.

They lie down on his bed together. He is already naked, and she has shed everything but her mask and panties. They kiss for a long while, and touch. She lets him explore her body, though he is maddeningly tentative. The excitement is becoming unbearable.

The Devirginator wraps her hand around his penis. Once again, it feels even bigger than it looks.

“Can I jerk you off?” she asks, “Would that be OK?”

“Yes,” he says, lying back on the bed and folding his hands behind his head, “please do.”

The Devirginator loves giving a good handjob, though she doesn’t usually take it to its logical conclusion. She wishes she had a bottle of cool, slippery lube to pour over him, but she doesn’t, and he certainly isn’t complaining. He plays with her breasts, ungracefully but enthusiastically, like a kid with a brand new toy, while she masturbates him.

Sometimes faster, sometimes slower, her hand never stops. She pauses to fondle his balls, or to trace a fingertip up and down the swollen vein that runs along the underside of his cock. Her finger softly traces the outlines of the swollen, sensitive head, spreading around the joy juice that is leaking out of his tiny pink hole. She gently pets his testicles, and begins to traverse further down into the darker, unexplored regions between his taut buttocks, but he squirms away. Then it is back to business.

She senses the change, senses him slipping past the edge, and instead of backing off, she goes with it. She grips him firmly and jerks him off, kissing and nibbling at his crinkly little nipples as her arm moves with the regularity of a metronome. Allegro con brio.

He goes off almost without warning. The only sound he makes as he orgasms is a gasping inhalation: “Uuuuuh!” He squirts a perfect arc of pearlescent white semen halfway up his nearly hairless sternum. She stays with him, stroking him until he is completely finished and too sensitive too touch, though her shoulder aches with it. Then, not being the wasteful sort, she laps up the salty-bitter come that is splashed all over his flat tummy. Every last drop.

“Was that alright?” she asks, “Are you still a virgin?”

“Yeah,” he says, still a little dazed, “I think so.”

The Devirginator makes to leave. She has places to be, cherries to pop tonight, but he stops her.

“Can I reciprocate?” he asks.

The Devirginator does not normally linger. ‘Full speed ahead’ is her motto: fuck ‘em and forget ‘em.

“Sure thing,” she says, sitting back down on his bed. She slides her silly red panties off. He goggles at her pussy as if it is the first one he has ever seen. Maybe it is. Have a good look. The Devirginator is emphatically not the waxing type. She does keep things neatly trimmed down there, but her pussy is neither airbrushed, nor does it taste like peach ice cream. She hopes this doesn’t freak him out: inexperienced guys who have seen a lot of porn can have some strange ideas about what belongs between a girl’s legs. But Ben doesn’t seem phased.

There is no shortage of wetness, that’s for sure. That is rarely a problem for the Devirginator. They experiment with a couple different positions, but what seems to work best is her sitting on his lap, legs splayed apart and leaning back against his solid, muscular chest.

His hands are aggravatingly clumsy at first. It takes a little hand-holding and instruction, but Ben proves to be a quick study, and he learns the terrain remarkably quickly. The Devirginator realizes that she is in serious danger of having an orgasm—a non-self inflicted orgasm, and Lord knows it’s been long enough! She would like to let go and scream out loud as the climax approaches, his hands drawing tiny circles up and down and all around her clit, but his parents are in the other room, so she stifles herself by kissing him hard and viciously on the lips. She is playing with her own nipples, pinching and pulling them harder than he would ever dare. Her spine ratchets and twists, and her toes curl as she comes. Not bad, not bad at all. Not even half-bad. She watches, smoldering, as he licks his fingers clean. It may not be peach ice cream, but he sure doesn’t seem to mind the taste.

Then the Devirginator makes her exit. She does, after all, have other fish to fry, other appointments to keep. She is smiling all the way down the drainpipe.

*

What makes a person a virgin? When I posed the question to Hami, he answered unequivocally.

“Sexual intercourse.”

“So a penis inside a vagina? That’s what defines virginity?”

He paused and mulled that over. “No, not necessarily. Any kind of sexual intercourse, really.”

“So if a scantily clad superhero broke into your bedroom and just gave you a handjob, that would count as losing your virginity?”

“No,” he shook his head. “I guess it would have to involve penetration of some kind or another.”

Hami’s problem wasn’t that he was bad-looking or ill-groomed. Far from it. His problem was that he was invisible. Tall, bespectacled, skinny as a shadow, quiet as a whisper, he was one of those anonymous, brown-skinned kids who sit in the front row of the classroom and always seem to get straight-As.

Actually, Hami was anything but another generic civil engineer to-be. Once I got past the shyness and the not-perfect English, he turned out to be pretty interesting, the kind of guy I’d like to be friends with. He was bright, philosophical, soft-spoken, liberal, irreverent, slightly perverted, and hilarious in an extraordinarily dry sort of way. And I was absolutely itching to pop his cherry. You want penetration Mr. Hami? You got it!

*

The Devirginator makes her entrance through the only window there is in his converted basement bedroom. In addition to her regular costume, she is wearing a black webbing harness, and attached to the harness is a large pink dildo that bobs and waves as she moves. Maneuvering herself through the tiny window without snagging her cape, pulling off her strapless bra, or getting the dildo caught is quite the Houdini act, and the Devirginator feels rather proud of herself.

Hami is sitting on the side of his bed. He is wearing white cotton pajamas. It’s pretty adorable.

“Are you who I think you are?”

“I think so.”

“Are you planning to do what I think you’re planning to do?” He looks pointedly at the brightly colored phallus projecting from the Devirginator’s crotch. “With that thing?”

“I sure am.”

The Devirginator hadn’t been at all sure what his reaction would be. It had been a gamble, based on a hunch. He might have run screaming. But no. Hami is smiling and pulling of his pajama tops. The gamble, so far, seems to be paying off.

She knows that his parents are watching TV in the room directly above them. That is half the problem with these boys, she reflects: they need to get their own apartments. He half-leans back on the bed, and she removes his pajama bottoms.

He has a very nice cock. Not too hairy, darker than she’s used to, uncircumcised. He is already halfway erect. It’s not huge, but it’s not small either, and she thinks it’s quite aesthetically pleasing.

She stands next to the bed and lets him suck her dick. She hadn’t thought this part would do anything for her—there aren’t any nerve endings in that pink dildo of hers—but in fact it is almost knee-bucklingly sexy. He is doing his damnedest to swallow her whole, and his hands are on her butt, and she is humping up against his hungry lips, and the base of the dildo keeps rubbing up against her clit, and she thinks that if he keeps this up, she might just be able to come.

The Devirginator pushes Hami away with both hands, sending him sprawling onto the bed. He lands on his back and pulls his knees up toward his chest. His balls are plump and ripe. His cock is definitely erect now, the purple crown peeking out from beneath the foreskin. His asshole is tiny and precious, pink compared to the brown of his skin. He smells slightly of exotic spices.

The Devirginator would very much like to spear him, impale him with one vicious thrust, bury her cock all the way up that tight little hole and fuck him like an x-rated Wonder Woman. But she doesn’t. She doesn’t stick her tongue up his asshole either, though she is deeply tempted. Instead, she pulls a small bottle of lube out of her utility belt, and dribbles it slowly onto his anus as if she is decorating a cookie. He whimpers, and bites down on his pillow. She pours more of the slippery stuff up and down her day-glo phallus.

She nudges the end of her dildo up against his tiny asshole. Her cock seems awfully big, and his opening is puckered tightly shut. It is possible that she has miscalculated.

She pushes a little harder. He grunts. His asshole yields, and she is inside.

Once in, the going is substantially easier. The Devirginator pushes in and pulls out and pushes back in again. Each time, she slides a little deeper. Each time she shoves it in, Hami grunts into the pillow, and his cock jumps and his balls shake.

The dildo is all the way up inside him. The bed squeaks every time the Devirginator thrusts with her hips. Hami is chowing down on that pillow of his. His dick jiggles and twitches pleasingly as she fucks his ass. It has gotten quite hard, quite hard indeed.

She really is going to come. She probably couldn’t stop right now, even if he wanted her to. Fortunately, he doesn’t appear to want any such thing.

The Devirginator wraps her hand around Hami’s penis. It feels delicious: hot and hard and smooth as silk. With her dildo buried all the way up to the flanged base in Hami’s tight little asshole, the Devirginator bucks her hips, grinding herself against the base of the dildo, relishing the expression on Hami’s face, and the stifled noises he keeps making as she sodomizes him. Her hand moves on his dick in precise sync with the motion of her pelvis. She feels herself slipping over the edge, and she is determined to take him with her.

Miraculously, they manage to come at the same time. Hami’s cock twitches and spurts at the exact same moment that the Devirginator’s orgasm washes over her. He splashes come all over his smooth, brown belly. She chews on her purple cape to keep from screaming out loud.

She gently withdraws from him, and cleans up his spilt semen with her tongue. Because she is not the kind of girl to let a good thing go to waste. Watching her lick up his come gets Hami hard all over again—he is, after all, only nineteen. He ends up jerking off onto her breasts, which she finds quite fetching, although he doesn’t produce nearly as much semen this time. The expression on his face as he comes though is truly priceless.

The Devirginator gets dressed again, removing the dildo from its harness and tucking it into her utility belt. Hami looks sleepy, and has a big goofy smile plastered across his face. The Devirginator asks him what it feels like to not be a virgin anymore.

“Nice,” he says, “it feels pretty nice.”

The Devirginator wouldn’t mind having that cock inside her sometime, no not at all. Perhaps another night. There is, after all, more than one kind of virginity.

The Devirginator slips out by the back door. The basement window would be too challenging and awkward to squeeze out through, so she takes the less dramatic route, quietly up the stairs and out into the night, past Hami’s parents who are sitting in the living room watching Baliwood on VHS with the volume turned up high.

When she gets home, the Devirginator masturbates herself to another orgasm, still wearing her costume. This time, though, it isn’t Hami she is fucking in her mind’s eye. It is Ben, and it isn’t a silicone dildo she is wearing either, strapped onto a cumbersome harness, but an actual flesh-and-blood penis. Anatomically impossible, but hot nonetheless.

*

The end of the semester was coming up, and my adventures as the Devirginator’s alter-ego and talent scout became curtailed by the very real necessity of studying for the final. Locating and seducing virgins suddenly became a much lower priority. I wanted to pass this test, and I wanted to ace it. I was studying my ass off, studying as hard as I had ever studied in my life. Don’t ever let anyone tell you that math is easy, because it ain’t.

I didn’t even realize she was flirting with me, not until long after the conversation was over. I’ve never been especially good at talking with girls. It always makes me feel gauche and awkward and unsure of myself. I’m never sure what to say.

Sally wasn’t even in my calc class. She was just a girl that I kept running into on campus. She was a pretty girl, younger than me, with round bouncy boobs, a pony tail, a pleasant smile, and a gorgeous wide ass that always seemed to be perfectly framed in a pair of tight, faded blue jeans.

I watched that ass hungrily as she walked away down the hall after one of our conversations. She had stopped and chatted, and I had set aside the heavy textbook and she sat down next to me, and next thing I knew we were talking about boys, crushes, sex, pornographic fantasies, superheroes, and virginity. As she walked away down the hall, her generous butt wiggling saucily, I realized in a self-conscious flash that she’d been flirting with me. And that I’d been flirting back, pretty shamelessly. Next time we met, she asked for my phone number, and I wrote it down for her, my ears blazing hotly and my hand trembling as I printed the digits.

*

The Devirginator picks Sally up in her little grey Toyota in front of her apartment building. Rarely has she been so nervous about a mission, and she’s not even sure why. She checks her costume one last time as Sally jogs up to the car.

Sally grins as she climbs in. “Holy shit,” she says, “I didn’t know you were being serious!”

Sally puts her hand on the Devirginator’s naked thigh, and the Devirginator breaks out in goosebumps and her stomach does a back flip. “I could kill my roommates for staying in tonight,” Sally goes on, not moving her hand from its position, perilously close to the crotch of the Devirginator’s fancy panties. “Let’s find somewhere to park, OK? I’m fucking dying of horny.”

The Devirginator parks her car in a cul-de-sac in an abandoned subdivision full of ghostly, unfinished McMansions. She really should be at home, working on her calculus, but math is about the furthest thing from her mind at this moment.

Sally starts it. Sally has more experience with this than the Devirginator does, though by her own admission she’s never taken it much further than ‘kissing and a little furtive touching’.

The kissing is very nice. And the touching is rapidly becomes less and less furtive and more and more overt. Pretty soon it is going to be downright pornographic.

If someone were to drive up right now, they would be treated to a show indeed. But no one does drive up, and the two girls quickly steam up the windows anyway.

Sally is a very good kisser. And Sally has very nice breasts. Once the Devirginator removes them from the confines of their brassiere, she can hardly bear to leave them alone. They are larger than the Devirginator’s (who’s own strapless bra is now down around her waist), and, she thinks, more shapely. Sally, although she appreciates the attention being paid to her own boobs, and enjoys nibbling and tweaking the Devirginator’s pink erect nipples, is eager to move onward and downward.

The front seat is just impossible. The steering wheel and gear shift are in the way, and the Devirginator’s cape keeps getting tangled. They move into the back seat, which is still cramped, awkward and uncomfortable, but better.

It is fun to kiss a girl, and it’s sexy, and it is a lot of fun to play with her boobs, but this is uncharted territory. The Devirginator isn’t sure exactly what is supposed to happen next.

Sally is all over that. She unbuttons her jeans, and gently pries the Devirginator’s hands away from her large, bare breasts, and guides them inside her pretty pink panties.

She is startlingly wet down there. It is hot and slippery. The Devirginator feels slightly lost. She isn’t exactly sure what to do with her hand, which strikes her as odd because she does this to herself on a daily basis. But still, it is different with someone else. Sally guides her finger, holding the Devirginator’s hand in her own, running laps up and down the length of her vulva. The Devirginator can feel a bump near the top that she is almost certain is Sally’s clit. Every time her fingers brush that bump, Sally jumps as if she has been shocked.

They are kissing the entire time. The action is making the Devirginator almost unbearably horny. She feels like she could finger-bang Sally all night long. Sally squirms impatiently away from her, pulling the Devirginator’s hand out of her panties.

“I want to fuck you now,” Sally says.

“I have a dildo in the trunk.” The Devirginator is actually blushing.

“Not like that,” Sally smiles. “Like this.”

The Devirginator lies down across back seat, hooking one leg behind a headrest. Sally pulls off the Devirginator’s bright red thong, and proceeds to fuck her hard and deep with her long, slender fingers, mashing her palm hard against the Devirginator’s clit. She presses one finger up against the Devirginator’s asshole. The Devirginator comes hard, and Sally kisses her all the way through the exquisite, languid, drawn-out orgasm.

When Sally pulls out her fingers—three of them!—the Devirginator’s pussy makes a slurping sound that sounds a lot like a fart, and the Devirginator is momentarily mortified. But Sally is doesn’t even seem to notice.

“Look how wet I made you!” Sally says, holding up her fingers to demonstrate. They are thoroughly coated in come, glued together and slick with the Devirginator’s juices. Sally is beaming with pride. The Devirginator licks the proffered fingers clean. She is just that kind of a girl.

The Devirginator drives Sally home. “I’m sorry you didn’t get to come.”

“I don’t mind,” Sally says. “It’s pretty hard to get me off. It was fun though. Maybe next time.”

“Will there be a next time?”

“Yeah, definitely. If you want there to be a next time?”

“Oh absolutely,” the Devirginator says, “I sure do.”

“Me too,” Sally says. “And maybe next time we could do it without the superhero costume.”

*

The Devirginator really should be studying. Tomorrow is the final exam. Instead, she scales the drainpipe, and slips into Ben’s bedroom through the open window.

She is hungry for him, viscerally, ravenously hungry. She is going to devour him, eat him alive, suck his dick until he comes in her mouth. Then she will go home and masturbate and do a little studying.

Ben is waiting for her. He is naked, but not in bed. He is standing in the corner, just out of sight, and when the Devirginator slips through the open window, he tackles her, throwing her onto the bed.

The Devirginator’s cape billows and flaps, just like a full-page panel out of a graphic novel. Her mask is knocked askew and almost comes off, and while she is straightening it out so she doesn’t reveal her face, he pulls her panties off.

For a fleeting moment, she thinks he is going to fuck her, and that would be just fine. But instead he dives face-first in between her legs.

The Devirginator has never been entirely sure she likes being eaten out. It hasn’t actually happened all that much, and the few times when it wasn’t weird or uncomfortable or awkward or over before it even started, it just didn’t seem to do that much for her. All the books say cunnilingus is the bomb and then some, but in general the Devirginator would rather suck and fuck.

This time, however, seems to be different. For one thing, it is apparent that Ben is in it for the long haul, not just a few tentative licks and come up for air. For another thing, and she isn’t entirely sure why this would be the case, the Devirginator doesn’t feel at all self-conscious about having him down there between her legs. She isn’t worried about whether the taste bothers him or whether he’s getting bored. She finds herself relaxing into what he is doing, and admiring his taut little football player’s butt while he’s doing it. And for another thing, she is beginning to realize that he is really very good at this. It’s partly technical (he’ll tell her later that he did quite a bit of reading up on the subject), and partly the intuitive sense of a skilled performer.

Ben laps incessantly at her clit, just flicking the end of his tongue up against it, like a kitten lapping at a saucer of milk. Every so often, he slurps up and down her vulva, spreading the slickness around, and now and then he slurps her clit in between his lips and sucks on it like a tiny rock candy. This makes the Devirginator squirm and squeal. She wishes he would stick one or two fingers up her asshole, but she can’t quite bring herself to ask him to. He licks enthusiastically, glancing up for approval now and then, which she gives in moans and groans and by tugging his hair. What he is doing is driving her crazy, building up a massive orgasm, a supernova, a Death Star explosion. He slips a finger, or maybe more than one inside her pussy, and the Devirginator writhes, balanced teetering right on the edge. What pushes her over is when she looks down at him and sees that he is jerking off while he eats her out. She comes and she comes hard, screaming into a pillow while her body shivers and shakes and she grinds her cunt up and down Ben’s eager licking face. He gets himself off while she is still reveling in the aftershocks, squirting his hot come all over the Devirginator’s wide-spread inner thighs, which only extends her orgasm.

*

The calculus final went far better than I had any right to expect. I got an A, by a comfortable margin. Ben was happy with his B+. And then he threw me for a loop when he asked if I wanted to get together with him Thursday night. Our studying days were over, and I figured I’d seen the last of him. No, he wanted to take me to a movie.

I can’t tell you much about the movie. I sat through the whole film, obnoxiously moist between my legs, busily second-guessing myself. This guy was way out of my league. He was a football star, a Boy Scouts poster child. He could be a male model, for God’s sake. And, echoing through the back of my head: he’s a virgin.

After the movie, Ben asked if I would like to hang out for a while, get some food or a cup of coffee or whatever. I told him I could think of something I’d rather do. That threw him for a bit of a loop. He asked if I’d like to come back to his house. I thought about his parents, watching TV in the living room, or reading in bed. I suggested that we go over to my apartment.

My place was a mess in an epic sort of way—I hadn’t anticipated having anyone over—and my bedroom floor was covered in a thick layer of comic books, math notes, dirty laundry, and superhero costume components that we had to wade through like fallen leaves. Ben didn’t seem to mind, though. I kicked a dildo under the bed, hopefully before Ben could see it. He was already busy, kissing and undressing me. I liked it when he was a little bit shy and unsure of himself, but I also adored it when he got aggressive and assertive. It turned a crank for me that I hadn’t even known I possessed. His erection was bulging nicely in the front of his jeans.

We landed in a heap on my bed. Thank goodness the sheets were at least reasonably clean. I think I mentioned before that size isn’t particularly important to me. That said, I think Ben has the perfect-sized dick. It is impressively big, big enough to be a bit of a challenge, but no so big as to be painful and/or scary. It is nice and thick, and has a beautifully shaped head. I got to try my hand at sucking it for the first time that night, on my bed, and I thoroughly enjoyed myself. On another occasion, I would happily have made a whole production of it, sucking his cock until he whined and whimpered, until his balls twitched and he squirted off between my hungry lips, but this wasn’t the night for it. We both knew that.

There was some debate about whether or not he should wear a condom. He was a virgin, and I was on the pill. In the end we decided that safe was better than sorry. He put one on, and I lay back on the sheets with my legs spread wide.

He slipped right in. Wetness was not a problem.

I almost never have sex missionary-style. There is something pedestrian about it that usually makes me avoid it. Not that I have a favorite position or anything. I pretty much like it any way I can get it. But I discovered that I really enjoyed fucking Ben face-to-face. I liked that we could kiss while we were doing it, and I really liked that I got to watch his face as he got more and more excited and then screwed his eyes shut and twisted his mouth into a grimace as he came inside me.

He didn’t last long. Virgins almost never do, and that’s fine with me. It’s part of their charm. I enjoyed every second of it while he lasted, and after he had extracted his softening penis and disposed of the condom, I whacked off while he watched, shamelessly rubbing my clit for him until I came, gasping and red-faced. It was a first for me, being watched like that.

Then Ben asked me if he could spend the night, and I heard myself saying “Sure.” Another first for me, but really, why not?

I slept poorly with another real live human being lying in bed next to me. I was half-turned on and half-claustrophobic all night, until we woke up before dawn and had delicious morning sex, missionary style all over again. This time Ben lasted longer, bringing me tantalizingly close to orgasm before shooting off inside the condom. I’ve never been able to come from penis-in-vagina sex. But I got the distinct feeling that maybe that could change.

I masturbated for him again, and this time he put a finger up inside me, and I came really fucking hard, and I was loud about it too. Fuck the neighbors, I really didn’t care.

“Wow,” Ben said, as we lay together on my bed, still basking in post-orgasmic glow. “Well, I guess I’m not a virgin any more.”

“Oh, I don’t know,” I said. “There’s a lot of ways to define virginity. You’ve never done anal. You’ve never been in a threesome. That’s every guy’s fantasy, isn’t it?”

Ben blushed. It was cute.

Later on, after more kissing and cuddling, and an improvised half-naked breakfast, Ben got dressed and regretfully left. He had to go to work. I promised him we’d get together again soon. Then I looked at my phone and saw that Lucy had texted me overnight, asking if I was free to hang out. “Maybe this weekend,” I told him.

Still wearing nothing but panties—plain old boring blue ones—I straightened out my bedroom. I changed the sheets, savoring the sex smell and the wet spots, and dug my dildo out from the dusty confines of under the bed. Then I hung my superhero costume up at the very back of the closet. The Devirginator was retired. At least for now.

END

Comments (9)

The Open Marriage Conundrum

1.

It was the first night that our marriage was officially open for business, and I just couldn’t seem to stop making an ass of myself. We were at a party–our friends Ted and Jackie’s house–and we had given each other permission to go home with whomever we pleased. I had been hitting on everything with tits; and every time I opened my mouth, I stuck my size 10 ½ foot right in.

Malinda Straus, formerly Ted and Jackie’s babysitter, now honors college student, was showing off about a mile of cleavage. I had her backed into a corner, and I was flirting shamelessly. My dick was hard in my pants. I placed my hand on her curvaceous hip. She didn’t flinch or pull away.

“Shall we get out of here?” I asked. “Wanna go for a drive?” Malinda was almost exactly half my age.

“Um, isn’t that your wife over there?”

“Yes, but…” I started to explain, but the moment was gone. With all the skill and agility of an NFL running back, she twisted and squirmed past me, and was gone. I felt like a douche, and my cock advertised that fact to the room, projecting obnoxiously out from the front of my pants. I got myself another drink, and tried to pretend that I didn’t care.

My wife, Lorraine, ended up going home with Chip and Skip, two gay friends of ours. I don’t know if they’re actually married, but if not, they might as well be. Lorraine asked me if I wanted to tag along, and I said ‘Sure’. I certainly didn’t have anything better to do. The three of them took their minivan; I followed them in our car. Alone.

Chip and Skip couldn’t possibly have been more mild-mannered and middle-of-the-road if they tried. Chip was an accountant and Skip worked in marketing. Or the other way around. They looked like they belonged in a Land’s End catalogue. And Chip, at least, was bisexual.

Chip wasn’t especially buff, but he had a pretty big dick, and he waxed off all his body hair, so it looked even bigger. He had a bellybutton ring. Lorraine, still fully dressed in her brown slacks and beige blouse, got down on her knees and started sucking his cock with a gusto and enthusiasm that made me, just an instant, a little bit jealous.

“I could do that for you too,” Skip said. The gay boys’ living room might have been decorated by PeeWee Herman. Skip and I were seated on what looked very much like the flayed hide of Fozzie Bear.

“No, thanks.” I told him.

“OK,” he said.

We watched as Chip undressed my wife, carefully and painstakingly removing each and every article of clothing and folding it neatly and stacking it on a chair before moving on to the next one. It was a strangely, powerfully erotic scene, and hypnotic to watch. By the time she stood nude in front of him, and they started to kiss and make out and touch each other, I was uncomfortably hard.

Chip’s dick just seemed to keep getting longer and harder, the more they fooled around. I wondered just how wet Lorraine was by now. Sopping wet, I was willing to bet.

“You can jerk off if you feel like it,” Skip told me. “I’m going to.”

He was already peeling off his clothes: casual-Friday blue jeans and a button-down shirt, with happy-face boxers underneath. His gear was more reasonable; about the size of my own, with a pronounced upward curve and a tidy patch of closely-trimmed pubic hair.

I was the only one left in the room with clothes on. Feeling more than a little bit self-conscious, I stripped down. My poor long-confined dick gratefully flopped free of my boxer-briefs. Skip waggled his eyebrows, possibly seductively.

Lorraine was on her hands and knees on their black leather couch, her rump thrust up, her tits hanging down. “You can put it anywhere you like baby,” she told Chip.

“I want to fuck that pretty little pussy,” Chip said, rolling on a condom.

“Oh goody,” Lorraine said, wiggling her ass. “Lucky me!”

I heard the squelch as he entered her. It was really pretty hot to watch them fuck. Skip was already jerking off, reclining next to me on the brown faux-bearskin rug, so I quickly got over my lingering vestiges of homophobia and joined him. He reached over and started playing with one of my nipples, gently rolling it around between his thumb and forefinger. It felt pretty nice, so I returned the favor, pinching and tweaking his hard little nipple while I masturbated.

Things were getting pretty hot and heavy on the couch. Lorraine and Chip were fucking hard and fast. He had a thumb planted up inside her butthole. “I’m gonna fucking come!” he grunted through clenched teeth.

“Oh yeah baby,” Lorraine moaned back, “come in my fucking cunt baby, fill me up!”

With a series of grunts like he was power-lifting, Chip came. I actually saw his balls twitch as he shot off. That did it for Lorraine. Hunched over, scrubbing desperately at her clit, she came to a whining, whimpering orgasm as he continued fucking her.

It was really sexy. And then Skip turned his head so his face was close to mine, and I could feel his breath on my lips, and then he kissed me, and I totally surprised myself by kissing him back. We jerked off side by side like that, kissing open-mouthed with tongues and all, and playing with each other’s nipples while we masturbated and our partners watched. It felt weird to be kissing a guy, but I didn’t really mind at all, and my cock was super-excited.

“Oh Dude, please come in my mouth!” Skip begged, and I obliged him, scooting up onto my knees and jerking myself off onto his extended tongue. Lorraine clapped her hands, and Chip looked on complacently as Skip licked the last few drops of semen from the tip of my cock. I thought it would bother me, but it didn’t, not at all.

Then Lorraine and I cuddled up on the big soft fake bear skin while Skip fucked Chip in the ass. He didn’t last long, he was way too excited, but it was pretty intense to watch. Chip could take just as well as he could give, and he sure seemed to enjoy being penetrated like that. Lorraine masturbated while they fucked; I slipped a finger up inside her warm, wet, freshly-fucked pussy while she played with her clit. She and Skip came at the same time.

Later on, in the car, Lorraine asked me what I’d made of it all.

“Meh,” I said, “it was OK.”

“This was your idea,” she reminded me.

“I know, I know”.

2.

We were at Emma and Joe’s, a couple we’d met off the internet. They looked mismatched to me: she was a big girl, and he was a string bean. They seemed nice enough anyway.

“He’s very well-trained,” Emma told us. “Joe: strip!”

With a meek “Yes, ma’am,” Joe stripped naked. His nipples were pierced with thick steel rings, and his cock hung down fat and semi-hard between his legs.

“Joey is a world-champion pussy eater,” Emma informed us. “Want to try him out?”

“But of course,” Lorraine said, hiking up her skirt and kicking her panties aside. Joe crawled in between her spread thighs, and started nuzzling and licking. I wished I had a better view of what was going on down there.

“Oh baby,” Lorraine told me, “it feels so good! I wish you could feel what he’s doing to my clit!”

“He’ll suck your husband’s cock too, if you want him to,” Emma said.

“What do you think, babe?” Lorraine asked me. “Do you want him to?”

“No thanks,” I said.

Emma had her own breasts out, which were almost disturbingly big, and she was playing with the large, pink nipples. “I can get three fingers up his ass,” she bragged, “with just spit for lube.”

She then proceeded to prove it to us, sticking her fingers into her mouth, and then roughly cramming them right up Joe’s anus. “Look how hard he’s getting!” she gloated.

Joe kept on licking under Lorraine’s skirt while Emma finger-banged his asshole. His cock was really hard. He was really getting off on this.

“Oh shit, I’m going to come!” Lorraine was chewing hard on her bottom lip. “He’s going to make me fucking come!”

She did too, and I felt that little twinge of jealousy again as she wiggled and whinnied and shook, squeezing Joe’s head between her thighs. He stayed with her the whole way through.

“He’s such a nasty little slut,” Emma told me as Lorraine lolled and stretched in post-orgasmic ecstasy. “You can spank his ass if you want.” She withdrew her fingers from Joe’s asshole and he grunted softly.

I did want to spank his ass. His head was still hidden under my wife’s skirt. From the sound of things, he was going to be giving her a second orgasm pretty soon. I slapped him hard across the butt. It made a sharp smack and left a nice red handprint on his pale butt cheek. I hit him again and again, as hard as I could, until my shoulder ached and my hand was swollen and sore. Emma looked on approvingly. She had somehow managed to strip down to her panties without me even noticing. She was wearing a tiny purple thong that looked faintly ridiculous on her bulky body.

Lorraine came again, louder and more abruptly than the first time. She pushed Joe away. His face was pink with the effort, and totally covered in her wetness.

“Why don’t you try this on for size?” Emma asked Lorraine. She was dangling a convoluted black harness in front of us, complete with a bright red translucent dildo.

It took a couple minutes for Lorraine to get the harness all sorted out. Emma passed the time by playing with Joe’s cock and balls. She traced her fingers all over his scrotum, up and down the shaft of his cock, round about the bulbous rim of the crown. Whenever he appeared to be getting the tiniest bit over-excited, she’d give his nipple rings a sharp tug. I watched, utterly fascinated, and not the least bit turned-on. My dick wasn’t even hard.

Finally, Lorraine had the strap-on adjusted correctly. Emma grinned wickedly, and poured what seemed like half a bottle of lube down Joe’s butt-crack. “Have at,” she said.

Lorraine had at, with a gusto and sense of urgency that lurked halfway between scary and deeply erotic. With her hands gripping his skinny hips, she fucked poor Joe’s ass hard, fast, and deep. Her lips were twisted into a grimace and her face was all red with the effort. Her tits bounced and jiggled, and Joe grunted raspily with each thrust. Emma held his erection balanced on her outstretched hand, so that as he got fucked, his cock rubbed lightly against her palm.

With a noise like a deflating balloon, Joe suddenly came, squirting pearlescent semen in a magnificent arc all over the hardwood floor. Slowly and reluctantly, with a wicked smirk plastered all over her face, Lorraine withdrew her cherry-red phallus.

“You could take a piss on him,” Emma told me, “if you want to.”

I fished out my penis and took aim, but nothing would come out. Apparently my bladder was feeling shy. So we all got dressed and thanked each other for a good time, and then we left. I felt like I had just attended a Tupperware party.

“So what’d you think of that?”

“Interesting,” I said.

“Would you like to try that at home sometime? Just you and me?”

“Which part? The golden shower?”

“No, silly. The strap-on sex.”

“Oh. Yeah, sure.”

3.

Gabby and Susan were a good ten years older than us, cowgirl lesbians of the dirty dungarees and rusty pickup truck variety. We were over at their house, we had smoked a lot of pot together, and that was when Gabby proposed that we all get in the hot tub, and we had all gotten naked, but somehow we hadn’t made it any closer to the Jacuzzi.

Neither one of them shaved at all, and they both had bodies more reminiscent of construction workers than ballerinas, so I was moderately surprised to discover that didn’t make it one iota less sexy as they ganged up on Lorraine and started molesting my wife right in front of me. My cock swelled and stood up. Susan leered over at me.

The women were splayed out all over the flagstone floor of the sun-porch. I lounged on the wicker couch, stroked myself, and watched.

They had Lorraine sandwiched in between their bodies, a mouth on each one of her breasts, suckling her nipples. Each woman had one hand between Lorraine’s legs, playing with her pussy.

She cooed, giggled, squirmed. Her pale, slender body contrasted nicely with Gabby and Susan, who were thick and sunburned, with utilitarian breasts and generous patches of hair between their legs and under their armpits.

The two older women slid down Lorraine’s body like a pair of serpents. Gabby landed square in Lorraine’s wide-open, pink and drooling pussy; Susan planted herself between Lorraine’s ass cheeks. Both women started licking. I stretched out across the couch and watched and masturbated.

Lorraine was biting down hard on her lower lip. Her hair was mussed up, her chest was blotchy and red, and she was playing with her own nipples as the women ate her out fore and aft. I knew she was really close to orgasm. Our eyes locked for a moment, and I knew. We would both come at the exact same moment.

Gabby and Susan must have known too. As if upon a prearranged signal, they suddenly broke off, pulling away from Lorraine and leaving her writhing like a tall tree in a windstorm.

Her pussy was drooling wet and wide open. I could see her fat pink clit from where I lay on the couch. She moaned softly, a plaintive mewing sound like a baby owl.

Gabby pulled on an elbow-length yellow rubber glove, the kind a plumber might don to explore the inner reaches of a clogged-up toilet. Susan slathered the glove and Lorraine’s pussy with what look like an entire container of lube.

“Sister,” Susan said, “you’d better get ready, because my girlfriend is going to fuck you up.”

Lorraine whimpered in response. Her legs were spread wide, her chest rising and falling rapidly. Gabby snickered.

Slowly and methodically, like a freight train starting up, one of those hundred boxcar jobs that thunder across the Midwest, Gabby began fucking Lorraine with her glove-covered fingers. First just one finger probed up inside, then two, then three. Susan dribbled on more lube; Lorraine’s moans became a constant keening whine; Gabby worked a fourth finger up inside my wife’s juicy, distended cunt.

“Come on baby, come on!” Gabby’s back was dripping rivulets of sweat. She was fucking Lorraine like a powerful hydraulic piston: slow, rhythmic, and utterly unstoppable.

“Take it, bitch!” Susan had Lorraine’s wrists pinned down. The muscles in her thick forearms bulged, and the veins stood out.

I swear I heard the slurp as the widest part of Gabby’s fist slid up inside Lorraine’s cunt, and her hand disappeared up to the wrist in my wife’s pussy.

Lorraine arched her back, and every muscle in her body tensed. “Holy shit!” she cried aloud, “Holy fucking shit!” Gabby leaned in and flicked Lorraine’s clit with the tip of her tongue. That was all it took. Lorraine came, shaking and wailing, sobbing like a baby.

When it was all over, the three women lay tangled together, covered in sweat and panting with exhaustion.

My dick was painfully hard, red and swollen, drooling with pent-up lust.

Gabby glanced over my way. “Oh you poor thing,” she said. “You really need to get off, don’t you? Susan would give you a blowjob if she wasn’t such a big fat prude.”

Susan made a face. “He could fuck Petunia. She’s rutting anyway.”

As if she’d been waiting to hear her name, Petunia came trotting into the room. Petunia was Gabby and Susan’s pet warthog; 300 pounds of hairy, bristly porcine flesh. She had wicked sharp tusks that she liked to sharpen in the front yard, digging unsightly gashes through the lawn, and she wore a little pink collar with bells dangling from the front. She seemed to size me up, looking me up and down with her little bloodshot red eyes. Sure enough, her requisite bits, under the stubby little tail, were swollen and pink.

“Go ahead,” Susan said, “Mount up. Come on, you know she wants it.”

At that moment, I just wanted to come. More than anything in the world, I wanted my cock to be someplace hot and wet and slippery, and to empty my poor aching balls right into that someplace. Petunia flicked her tail and tossed her head, making the bells on her collar tinkle. Her tusks gleamed white as bone. I looked to Lorraine for guidance, and got an unreadable expression in return.

Fuck it. With six eyes riveted to me, I nuzzled up behind Petunia, stroking her coarse, hairy flanks. I nudged my erection against her puffy warthog labia. She was wet. I nudged forward, slipping inside.

It was a tight fit, but Petunia didn’t seem to mind. She grunted agreeably as I started fucking her. I reached around her belly, feeling her girth and her warmth, and humped away, oblivious to my audience.

“Stick a finger up her ass!” Susan advised, and Gabby hooted. I ignored them. It felt too good, and I wasn’t about to stop. Petunia flattened her ears against her head as I squelched in and out of her. She took it stolidly, like a hairy, four-legged Fleshlight.

It didn’t take me very long. With an orgasmic rush of pleasure that curled my toes, I emptied my balls into her patient warthog vagina. It felt absolutely amazing. I filled her to overflowing, and kept on humping. When I was all done, and my soft, slippery cock slid out of her passage with a pop, Petunia tossed her head again, snorted, and amiably ambled away. I hoped it had been good for her too.

On the drive home, I asked Lorraine how she felt.

“A little sore,” she said. “How about you?”

“I feel like a pig fucker.”

“That was wild,” she said, and squeezed my hand.

4.

I ran into Malinda again while I was out on a run, early in the morning before the heat of the day came rolling in like the high tide. Or, to be more accurate, she ran into me. She caught up with me struggling up the long, slow grade of Heartbreak Hill, and she fell into step with me as we crossed over the apex and began the sweet relief of the descent.

“Is it true that you’re in an open marriage?” she asked.

I was completely out of breath. It was all I could do to gulp “Yeah”.

“So she lets you sleep with other women?”

“Yeah.”

“And you don’t mind if she sleeps with other men?”

“Yeah.” My eloquence-o-meter had dropped off the bottom of the chart.

“Weird,” Malinda said, jogging matter-of-factly along beside me, “Weird. But cool.”

She didn’t look like much of a runner. She was plump and soft and curvy. But she was also kicking my ass, and not even breathing hard. I liked the way she looked as she floated along effortlessly beside me, in short-short pink shorts and a black jog-bra. Her breasts bounced along like cartoons, and one little rivulet of sweat ran down between her collar bones and disappeared into her cleavage. I puffed and huffed and clomped along, trying to keep up without looking like it was killing me. I’m not sure how successful I was.

I’d thought I was following her, but Malinda was following me. All the way home. When we breezed in the door, sweaty and winded and already grateful for the air conditioning, Lorraine was sitting in front of the computer, cup of coffee close at hand, playing Hack and Slash. She waved a hand distractedly in our direction, “Have fun!”

We went into the bathroom and closed the door behind us. Malinda sat down on the toilet and watched me undress. I already had a jutting hard-on. I felt oddly self-conscious under her half-amused gaze. I kept picturing myself fucking the warthog in front of two-and-a-half lesbians. What on earth had I been thinking? Why hadn’t I just let Skip suck my dick at the beginning of this debacle; a mouth is just a mouth, and he was probably really good at it. I had a bad feeling that I’d been behaving like a douche from the very beginning. Malinda caught me blushing, and smiled.

I turned on the shower. My dick was standing straight up, bobbing eagerly at a 45 degree angle. Malinda stood up and peeled off her running clothes. Now it was her turn to blush.

“You’re sure your wife doesn’t mind?”

“I’m sure.”

Naked, she looked even younger than she did dressed. Her skin was soft and flushed pink with exercise and excitement. Her boobs seemed impossibly big. There was a fluffy tuft of blondish pubic hair nestled between her legs, which were thick and curvaceous. She stepped hesitantly into the shower with me.

“I don’t have a lot of experience,” she said.

“It’s OK,” I told her.

We kissed for a while, rubbing our soapy wet bodies up against each other. It had been a long, long time since I had kissed like that. It felt fantastic. So did the way my cock kept rubbing up against her belly.

Finally, after what seemed like an eternity of bliss, Malinda dropped down onto her knees in front of me, and eagerly started sucking my dick.

Malinda may not have had a lot of experience—she couldn’t seem to get a good rhythm going, and kept switching around between techniques in a way that threatened my sanity—but she had enthusiasm by the boatload. She licked and kissed her way up and down my cock and balls, even straying down my perineum and perilously close to my asshole before chickening out. She tried—and failed—to swallow me whole. She rubbed her big soft tits up and down my erection. One hand kept straying down between her own thighs to stroke her own kitty. She bobbed her head up and down on my cock, her teeth grazing against my glans, then looked up at me, like a puppy-dog searching for approval.

“I’ve gotta come,” I told her. My whole being ached with the need.

“Masturbate for me,” she said. Her own hand was busy down between her legs.

I wrapped my own familiar hand around my dick, pointing my cock at her like a loaded gun. “Can I come on your tits?”

“Go for it,” she said, her finger darting up and down her furry pussy like a sewing machine needle. She arched her back, presenting her sizeable rack to me.

God I came hard! My calf cramped up just as I came, and my orgasm was a shrill battle cry of equal parts ecstasy and agonizing pain. Gob after gob of pearly white semen splattered all over Malinda’s proffered breasts.

She scooped some of my ejaculate tentatively up with one finger and brought it up to her lips. “It’s not bad,” she pronounced after she had licked her finger clean. “I was afraid it would be gross, but it’s really not too bad.”

“It takes a little getting used to,” Lorraine said. She was standing in the open bathroom doorway. “I happen to like it quite a lot, but I guess it’s an acquired taste.”

A little while later, when Malinda had gotten dried off and dress and jogged off in the direction of her house, Lorraine wrapped her arms around my naked body, batting at my soft penis like a cat with a toy.

“That was hot,” she told me. “It was really hot watching that.”

“Really?”

“Oh yeah. Better than watching you make out with make out with Skip. Better than watching you spank that Joey kid. Even better than watching you fuck a wild pig. God, that was raunchy! So… do you think Malinda does girls?”

I could feel an insistent nagging in my dick that told me it wouldn’t be soft too much longer. “You’ll just have to ask her,” I said.

“Mmm,” Lorraine said, squeezing my now not-especially flaccid cock and pressing herself up against my backside, “You know what I’d like even better than just fucking her?”

“What?” I asked. My dick was definitely erect now. I hadn’t had that kind of turn-around time since I was in my twenties.

“Making a Malinda sandwich: me fucking her while you fuck her at the same time. That would be hot!”

Yes it would.

“I want to feel you inside me,” Lorraine said. “Let’s go back to bed. Right now.”

And we did.

END

Comments (6)

Two in the Hand, One in the Bush

Promises made to oneself in the cold, hard light of day are oh so easy to break. I can’t sleep. Between my legs, my cunt is huge, sticky and swollen. Wet. A touch is all it would take.

I squeeze my thighs together, and my clit throbs hungrily. This doesn’t count, right? I’m not actually touching.

I can’t sleep. It’s late, and I have to get up early. I think about my professor, that guy in my class who always wears the tight blue jeans with the torn out knees, that girl on the subway who caught my eye.

I picture them naked. Fucking, sucking; each other, me. I imagine pulling my professor’s hard cock out of his trousers and gobbling him whole. I picture that guy in my class tumbling into bed with me, his cock hard and fat, pointing up at my ceiling. I make up a whole scenario where that girl from the subway follows me home, and we don’t even make it into bed, but end up in a writhing, twisted 69 on my couch.

My panties are damp, through and through. I kick them off in frustration. I’m not just wet down there, I’m soaked.

Screw it. I give in to temptation at last, languidly trailing two fingers up and down my slippery valley. I can’t even touch my clit; she’s red-hot and hyper-sensitive. I won’t last long. Even if I try to drag it out, I’m too revved up.

I kick off the blanket so I can see what I’m doing.  My fist is clenched between my thighs, so that every time I squeeze my legs together it presses hard against my cunt.

I imagine them gathered around my bed, watching me, masturbating to the sight of me masturbating. My professor and the guy from my class have their dicks out, jerking off above me; the girl from the subway has her panties down, one foot up on the bed for better access, playing with her clit, her eyes fixed on me. In a confused montage of voyeurism and exhibitionism, my orgasm crashes over me, sending me gasping and spinning over the edge. I try to make it last forever. Finally, I am done.

So much for willpower. What has it been… 25, 26 hours? I mentally kick myself in the ass. Tomorrow will be different. Tomorrow I will stay after class and talk to my professor. I will ask that guy for his phone number. I will make eye contact with that girl from the subway, and I won’t let the moment scare me away. I will give her my best smile, I’ll sit down on the bench next to her, and I’ll tell her my name and ask for hers’.

I bask in the after-glow, sleep threatening to roll over me like a rising tide. Tomorrow I will get a boyfriend. Or a girlfriend. Or an anatomically-correct Muppet friend. Or a two-headed space alien friend, as long as it’s genitals are roughly compatible with mine. And I’m not going to masturbate again until I do.

*

She wakes me up by dragging a pipe wrench along the corrugated steel of the cage. I’m not sure how much I slept; but I can tell you, it wasn’t much. My body aches. My legs are cramped and sore and my wrists are chafed, and I can feel the stripes on my back like they were etched there in acid. My mouth tastes like dry piss, and my dick is hard as a two-by-four.

“Rise and shine,” she sing-songs cheerfully, “rise and shine! I’ve got a special treat for you.”

I lap the proffered coffee up gratefully. It is mercifully warm and sweet.

“Still good to go?” She asks, gazing skeptically down at me. “After all that fun we had last night?” My erect cock twitches, answering for me. “Well, well, well, aren’t we just an eager little bunny?”

She unshackles my wrists, and I try to shake the tingling out of my puffy hands. She spits helpfully into my palm.

“You’ve got ten seconds,” she says. “Better get started, time’s a wasting. Nine… eight…”

I start frantically jerking off. My hands are partially numb, which makes it both strange and slightly clumsy. I concentrate on her tits, because they are naked and right in front of my face. I’d rather be masturbating between her ass cheeks, or onto her spread pussy, but I’ll take what I can get.

“Spank it little monkey, spank it! Five… four…”

She grabs each of my nipples in wicked pinch between thumb and forefinger, and tugs and pulls. I swear to God, I think she is trying to yank them right off my chest! Despite myself, I howl.

“Three… two… one!”

I come right on cue, not a second too late, orgasming with a shriek, an incredibly intense cocktail of pent-up lust suddenly released; glorious pleasure; and genuine wracking pain as she twists my poor, distended nipples.

Mercifully, she allows me to savor the orgasm for a few moments.

And then the manacles go back on, and she slams closed the cage door, and I am left all alone in the darkness, gobs of semen getting cold and runny all over my stomach and chest.

I have to pee something fierce, and there is nothing for it but to let go. The urine sprays all over my legs, warm at first, and then all too quickly cold and uncomfortable.

Later, she brings me a bowl of cold, congealed oatmeal. I hate oatmeal. Next weekend, when it is her turn to bottom, she is going to suffer mightily.

*

I’m still a little bit high on the E as we stumble back into my apartment. Goblins and leprechauns lurk in the dark corners of my peripheral vision.

I’m so horny I can taste it. We were practically making out on the dance floor, kissing and touching lewdly right there in the club. He told me his name earlier, but I don’t remember what it was: Jim or Tim or was it Chip? It was loud and I was pretty toasted. Horny, drunk, and more than a little bit nervous. All this conspired against my short-term memory. Especially when combined with a healthy dose of ecstasy. I’ve still got the jitters. My whole body feels like it’s made of electricity.

He’s cute. Not my usual type, really; but cute nonetheless. Pretty boy, fine feminine features. And a highly visible erection inside those tight, tight pants. I kept playing with that cock while we danced; grabbing his package, running my hand up and down his length, rubbing my ass up and down his crotch.

He did his share of touching too, but I know something he doesn’t. The bulge in the front of my jeans is a sham. I’m packing, and underneath that pastiche my panties are damp and sticky.

I don’t know how he’s going to react when he discovers the truth. I never do; that is part of the thrill, the terror, the lust. I hope he likes what he finds. I hope he likes my strap-on rig too. But one never knows…

We kiss and grope our way across the room, tumble onto the couch. I want to fuck this one in the worst possible way. Hard and deep and fast, until he’s begging for mercy. And then, if he’s up for it, I want him to fuck me exactly the same.

He doesn’t seem as into it any more; he’s not kissing me back the way I’d like him to be. His erection seems to have faded. He doesn’t know already does he?

No. He’s asleep. Fucker. He’s fallen asleep, and he’s not waking up, not without a bucket of ice-cold water over his head, and I’m not that much of a bitch. Shit.

Frustration. I pull off my jeans, toss aside my panties and the dildo I was packing. I shaved and everything for this. I straddle his chest and whack off over him. It doesn’t take long, not in my present state. If I were a dude, or one of those girls who can squirt on command, I’d shoot off all over his expensive Armani shirt. As it is, when I’m all done, I press my wet, come-slick finger up against his sleeping lips. We’ll see what happens in the morning.

*

“Are you serious?”

“Darn tootin’ I’m serious. Twenty bucks, right here, right now.”

“Twenty bucks?” She’s not really my type: kind of fat, copper-red hair, mean eyes. I don’t know why my dick’s suddenly so hard.

She fishes out her wallet, checks her billfold. “Forty dollars. You’re not going to get a better offer.”

I came here with my friend Clarissa, who has conveniently disappeared. Chatting up some cute little lipstick lesbian in a dark corner, no doubt.

Another woman, curvy hips and cleavage and long dishwater hair, pulls a bill out of her front pocket. “Ten bucks more makes it fifty. Whip it out.”

The bartender, who looks like Xena gone to pot chimes in: “And a free drink. Come on Mister, let’s see the goods.”

Paralyzed by indecision. Staring, hungry eyes. I’m surrounded, encircled by predators. And then I take the plunge.

I slip off the barstool, fumble with my zipper. They hoot and leer. “Get up on the bar. Get up there so everyone can see!” Helpful hands push, shove, and pull me up onto the bar.

I let my jeans fall, pause, and pull down my boxers. My erection bobs and waves to the crowd like a glad-handing jack-in-the-box. “Nice one,” somebody chortles.

I am suddenly high, dizzy on the attention and the exposure and the weirdness of it all. I don’t think my cock has ever been harder.

“Jack-off! Jack-off! Jack-off!” the women chant, and so I do it. The entire process won’t take but two minutes. One hand is wrapped around my erection, the other spreads my butt-cheeks, penetrating my anus. The short, fat copper-hair lady hoots. Dishwater Blonde pumps her fists like a cheerleader. My back is arched, my balls drawn up tight, my penis is purple and drooling.

The bartender proffers a shot glass, and I come right into it, grunting like a bullfrog, filling the bottom third of the glass with pearly white semen while the girls all hoot and holler. They applaud as I milk the last few drops of come out of my swiftly wilting cock. Bartender smoothly fills the balance of the shot glass with vodka, and hands it off to Dishwater Blonde, who slams the cocktail down without hesitation.

I slide down off the bar and back to my stool, pulling up my pants and buttoning up. I feel kind of shaky and hollow inside. Clarissa is no-where to be seen.

I take my money, and my free drink.

The dirty-blonde lady with the big butt and the cleavage popping out of her flannel shirt puts a sisterly hand on my shoulder. “Stick around here kid, you might learn a thing or two.”

*

They’ve been going at it for hours. A thin layer of sheetrock does next to nothing to mask the sounds they are making: with my ear pressed up against the wall, I can hear everything.

My brother has a new boyfriend. I never caught his name. It doesn’t matter, he’ll have another one by next week. My brother goes through boyfriends like I go through tampons.

While they were just making out and fooling around, I mostly couldn’t tell exactly what was going on, who was doing what to whom; but just that was more than enough to make my pussy all juicy-wet. All that kissing, bumping, slurping, moaning; all those intimate noises of male pleasure turned my crank something fierce. And the best part was still to come.

There is a pause, a sudden silence. This is what I’ve been waiting for. On the other side of the wall, they are getting into position, shedding any last articles of clothing, rolling on a condom, slathering in lube.

“Go easy Dude,” I hear my brother say. “You’re fucking hung.”

I’ve seen my brother jerk off. It’s hard to imagine him describing another guy as ‘fucking hung’, or being intimidated by any cock.

“Take it, cunt!” That’s the boyfriend’s voice, harsh and guttural, resonating through the sheetrock.

“Oh… Fuck! Fuck… fu-uck… fuuuuck! Yes!”

“Like it, don’t you little slut? Come on bitch, fuck my dick!”

I can hear the bed creaking underneath them. I can hear the boyfriend slamming into my brother, who is grunting, gasping and whining incoherently. My pussy is soaking wet, absolutely drooling joy juice.

“Fuck dude! Fuck dude! Fuck dude!” The boyfriend is chanting, raspy and throaty, as he brutally shoves his cock in and out of my brother’s asshole.

I wonder if the boyfriend is jerking him off as he fucks his ass; I wonder if my brother is flat on his back so he can look the guy in the eyes, or if he is on all fours getting fucked doggy-style; I wonder if they are kissing as they fuck. God, I’m going to fucking come.

“Oh shit!” my brother wails, “I’m going to come! I’m going to fucking come! Fuck my ass! Please, please, please don’t stop!”

Please don’t stop. They are snarling at each other like a pair of fighting dogs. I have a finger up my own asshole, and I’m strumming my clit like a steel guitar. Please don’t stop. They are coming now, both of them, and they don’t give a shit if I hear it, or if our parents hear it, or if the freaking neighbors up the street hear it. And I am right there with them.

Sometimes, when I listen to my brother fuck, I imagine him doing it to me. Sometimes I picture doing it with his boyfriend, right in front of him. Sometimes I imagine them double-teaming me. But mostly, I think about them fucking each other, right there on the other side of the wall.

*

I wouldn’t feel so weird about watching, I don’t think, if Dad jerked off like a normal guy. I’d still watch of course, and get myself off to it, but I don’t think I’d feel like such a big fat perv about it.

He tiptoes out onto the deck, wearing nothing but a skimpy pair of emerald-green bikini panties. He is hairy, and has a big belly, and they look funny on him. His cock is erect, peeking out the waistband like a papoose.

He is carrying a little green spangled purse in one hand, a big fat dildo in the other. It is an obnoxiously large one; realistically molded with veins and fake balls and everything, the not-quite-flesh color of cheap latex, and a suction cup on the base. He looks around one last time, just to make sure no-one is watching, licks the suction cup, and slaps it with a squelch against the sliding glass door, where it sticks, quivering like a spear.

From my perch up above, I can see everything.

Three clothespins come out of his little handbag. This part always makes me wince, and it makes my already damp pussy positively drool. One clothespin goes on each nipple; the last one gets clamped onto his extended tongue. I wonder if he and mom used to play this way. From the pictures I’ve seen of her, it’s hard to imagine: she looks so pretty and prim, as if she was made of porcelain.

His tongue lolling awkwardly out, he fishes a little bottle of lube out of the sequined purse. This gets slathered liberally all over the obscene dildo. Now he is ready. And so am I.

Down on all fours, he shuffles backward, a semi-truck backing carefully into a loading dock. The protruding dildo finds its target. He grunts softly. His penis springs out of his undersized panties like a sprung trap. His balls hang down, heavy and pendulous.

Between my legs, I am sopping wet. I squeeze my thighs silently together, pressing my hand against my sex.

Gingerly, he inches back, impaling himself. It doesn’t look particularly comfortable. His face is twisted into a grimace. His dick twitches with every movement. It is an angry shade of red, and even from up here I can see it is oozing clear sticky juice. His hairy testicles, half-captured by the waistband of his panties, swing like wrecking balls.

I watch, fascinated, as my Dad sodomizes himself on our open-air back porch. Faster, faster, faster, I can hear him panting and grunting, his tongue lolling out, the wooden clothespin emphasizing the point.

He is going to come soon, and so am I. My hand is clutched between my thighs, thoroughly coated in slippery wetness. I can feel my own pulse.

He reaches, gropes, pulls a tiny silver lipstick-shaped vibrator from his purse. With the grotesque dildo buried all the way up his ass, he presses the tiny humming vibrator against the underside of his cock, just below the head. His back is arched, his head thrown back in apparent ecstasy. With a drawn-out rasping, choking noise, he comes, shooting gobs and gobs of pearlescent semen all over the slats of our elevated back deck.

If I were another, braver girl, I would let him know that I know. I would drop subtle hints, not-so-subtle hints, interrupt him in the middle of the action. I would jerk him off with three slippery fingers up his butt; I’d make him lick my spread pussy while he butt-fucks himself. But I’m not that girl, so I just watch.

*

I haven’t jerked off in a week. I’ve been studying too much, too hard. Calculus II. Differential equations. Heavy-duty math. It makes my head hurt.

30-odd students file in, sit down. I take my place at my regular desk, and she passes out the exams. Professor Langerfelder has a reputation for tough tests. This one is a single page, double-sided, sixteen questions; blurrily photocopied; typed for fucks’ sake, typewritten on a genuine old-fashioned typewriter, with the exponents penned in by hand.

All around me pencils start to scratch. My palms are sweating, my heart rate is elevated. Between my legs, my dick feels heavy and thick. I glance up, and make brief eye contact with Professor Langerfelder. Is that a hint of a smile? She has long, gunmetal hair, and ghostly pale skin.

I press a button on the little remote in my pocket, and the plug in my butt starts to buzz. I glance guiltily around to see if anyone can hear it, but nobody is paying any attention. They are all buried conscientiously in their tests. My dick is instantly hard, a log, an old growth redwood, straining against my jeans.

I squirm in my seat, humping against nothing. My asshole is stretched wide around the toy. The vibrations jangle my prostate, threatening my sanity. The thing is pressed hard against the base of my cock from the inside, grinding away like an ill-tuned chainsaw.

This worked like motherfucking voodoo last semester.

I am rocking back and forth in my seat now, desperate. I don’t give a rat’s ass about discretion, I just want to come. My dick is straining, strangled. Just the friction of flesh on denim is driving me insane. The buzzing is relentless. My sphincter tries to clench, but is deliciously frustrated by the fat toy in my ass.

I glance up again. This time there is definitely a small tight smile on her face.

It takes everything I have not to shout out as I come. For a second, it feels like it will last forever. Every muscle in my body is locked in a rigid state of tetanus. My penis jumps inside my jeans, spasming desperately against nothing, and I come, squirting hot and sticky semen all over my inner thighs, instantly creating a big fat wet spot on my jeans.

The wetness inside my pants is already cold and clammy. I thumb off the remote, halting the buzzing, and settle down to work on my exam. I am going to ace this motherfucker.

*

It never ever fails to do it for me, and I almost always come circling back to this scene, usually sooner rather than later, but I don’t really have any say in the matter.

I remember every detail with unnatural clarity, which makes the whole scene seem stilted and unreal, but I’m convinced it actually happened.

It is winter, and it is night. The stars are out. I am just a girl, right on the borderline of puberty, balanced on the knife’s edge. I am alone in the house, I don’t know why.

I am upstairs in my bedroom, kneeling on a chair, looking out the window, gazing down at the scene unfolding in our front yard. My hand is inside my panties.

A pickup truck hit a deer, right in front of our house. It was a big stag, a four-point buck; and the front end of the pickup is all caved in, the hood crumpled up like aluminum foil.

The stag’s back is broken. He is in our front lawn, struggling spasmodically again and again to stand up on his front legs. His eyes are huge and rolling. The back half of his body is split open. There is a lot of blood, and worse things than blood.

A state trooper has already arrived. His cruiser is parked diagonally across the road, the blue lights on his light bar flashing epileptically. He gets out of his car and walks calmly over to the flailing buck.

He draws his automatic from the holster on his hip, and shoots the broken deer in the head. The gunshot is shockingly loud. The animal collapses immediately, unstrung, dead, a lifeless piece of meat. The trooper shoots him again. This time I see the tongue of fire leaping from his gun. My finger brushes against my engorged clit, and I come.

Thinking about that night never fails to make my pussy wet and twitchy. I don’t know which part does it for me: the trooper, calm and erect in his crisp uniform; the broken animal; or the gun itself; but I come, and I come hard. That first time, and every time thereafter.

*

It’s not the best porno I’ve ever seen, but then again it’s far from the worst. The disc came out of a little wooden box secreted under my roommate Victoria’s bed.

The action centers around a skinny girl with a lot of tattoos, asymmetrical eyes, and relatively normal-sized breasts. She is entertaining two fairly thuggish-looking guys with the requisite big dicks.

Victoria is lying face-down on her bed in front of me. Her brown hair is pulled back in a ponytail, and she is wearing a red-and-white checked dress that just about exposes the backs of her knees. We’ve been roommates for just under six months; I answered her ad on Craigslist. The girl has a huge set of tits, oversized for her small frame. They remind me of a pair of juicy, ripe cantaloupes; and I would pretty much give my left nut just to jerk off all over them.

“Are you ready?” she asks. All her attention is focused on the movie playing out in front of us, which is not really my cup of tea. The skinny protagonist is noisily and sloppily trying to suck two cocks at once. The camera is zoomed in so tight that it’s almost abstract. If it were any closer, you wouldn’t even know what body parts you’re looking at.

“I’m ready,” I say.

She hikes up her skirt. With a wiggle, she sheds her modest pink panties, slithering them down her legs and kicking them off with a flick of her ankle.

Her ass is a gourmet’s delight. Soft, petite, pale; two delicious-looking globes of flesh split down the middle by a dark, enticing cleft. My cock, which was hard already with the innuendo and anticipation, to say nothing of the porn, jumps and throbs. I extract it from my pants; it points at her ass like a guided missile. Warhead armed.

“Do you want to see?” I ask. On the screen, the action has shifted. The girl is tag-teaming the guys, fucking one while sucking the other’s dick.

“No,” Victoria says, “but I do want to hear. Make it loud for me.”

I start jerking off over her butt, watching her watch the porno. I want to see, very badly, but I’m not about to push my luck. I make it loud for her, grunting with every stroke like I’m doing karate chops. This seems to do it for her alright, and she wiggles her tush invitingly. My balls jiggle and swing as I masturbate, heavy and full.

It doesn’t take me long. I’m pretty primed, more turned-on by this whole scene than I had realized. When I come, I don’t even have to ham it up too much. A vibrato grip on my swollen dick sends me right over the edge. I am arching my back and squeezing my balls and hollering like a wild boar as I come, spattering big fat drops of semen up and down Victoria’s cute little buttocks like a summer rainstorm.

“Awesome,” she says, still not looking up. “Now lick it all up.”

This is what we agreed to, before we even started, and while I’m not exactly psyched about the prospect, I don’t really mind either. I get down on my belly and start lapping up the come that I spilled all over her ass.

I don’t hate the taste. It is salty, slimy, a little bitter. Reminds me of rice pudding. The girl in the video is busy being double-penetrated, and the on-screen trio is working up to the grand finale. Victoria’s fingers are busy underneath her, just out of sight. I can hear her touching herself. I can smell her excitement, taste it almost. Her flesh is soft and warm. I let my tongue explore the dark cleft between her butt cheeks, experimentally brushing up against her tiny anus. She makes a little mewing sound and presses back against me. I am hard all over again.

The mewing noise abruptly cuts off, and her body goes rigid, and it takes me a moment to realize that she is having an orgasm. My face is nestled between her ass cheeks, my tongue is flicking against her anus.

She squirms away from me when she is done. The credits are rolling on the TV screen (Bunny Pudenda?? Who comes up with these names anyway?). Victoria rolls over, legs pressed discreetly together. There is a neat triangle of thin, closely trimmed black hair between her thighs. She has a big, fat sloppy-drunk grin plastered across her face.

“Nice,” she says. “Very nice. Next time I want to watch you do it.”

END

 

Comments (2)

It Won’t Be Long Now

I won’t make it through the night. I can feel it, deep inside. It won’t be the cancer that kills me, though that’s what the doctors are all in a tizzy about; it’ll be old age, plain and simple. I’m old, my body is falling apart, the parts are worn out, and nothing works right anymore. Not hardly.

It won’t be long now. I hear the night nurse come on. She told me her name, ages and ages ago, when they first put me in this ward; but I don’t remember it.

“How are you tonight Mr. Holder?”

“I’m fine,” I croak. It is an old man’s voice, and it’s a lie. I’m not fine, I’m dying, and we both know it. But there are appearances that have to be kept up, the little untruths that make conversation work.

She looks over my chart and tut-tuts. She gives me a sponge bath, quick and efficient. I can feel myself getting hard, and despite everything, I am self-conscious about it. She rolls me over, changes the sheets, adjusts the electrodes, puts in a new IV.

I hear her taking off the latex gloves, and I really am hard now, rigid with anticipation and desire. Is it ironic that this part of me still works, when all the other systems are failing? I don’t mind, no not really at all.

I’ve never seen her. I lost my vision when I had the stroke that landed me here in the first place. Not long ago, I’ve lost track; a couple, three weeks, I suppose. She’s a black girl, I can tell that from her voice. Just a trace of an accent. Her parents were from the deep south, she was born in Chicago. She’s young enough to be my daughter, my grand-daughter even. I wonder if she’s got children of her own. She’s a big woman, though I wouldn’t call her fat. Solid, no-nonsense. Christ, I wish I could remember her name.

She wraps her soft, firm hand around the shaft of my cock. “That’s right Mr. Holder, just relax. It feels good, doesn’t it?”

It does feel good, and despite myself I moan and squirm under her touch. She starts off slowly, like she always does, and it always makes me want it more and more, harder and faster. It is that same old hunger, now nearly a century old, the same old hunger that made me follow Susie Pearson up into the hayloft, hoping against hope that it wasn’t really hide-and-seek that she wanted to play.

Susie had a reputation already, not a good thing for a girl to have, back in those days. Susie didn’t have a dad: Mr. Pearson went away to the war—the Great War, the war to end all wars—and when he came back, Mrs. Pearson had a little baby. They got by, I guess, but people talked. Susie was smart though, smarter than any boy I knew, and damn she looked good. She was nothing but curves, busting out all over, and a wicked, hungry gleam in her eyes.

I still remember the smell of that hayloft. I can’t bring her face to mind, but I remember the way she tasted. Her kisses, not that. Later on Susie taught me other, more esoteric, less socially acceptable uses for my tongue, but on that first afternoon I just kissed her mouth, which was plenty exciting enough for me. She fished my dick out of my dungarees. I was hard as ironwood. “This is happening,” I remember thinking. “This is actually happening to me.”

She told me I had a real nice one. She said it was the biggest she’d ever seen, which may or may not have been the truth. She said, licking her lips like a cat, that it would win first prize at the county fair. She let me play with her boobies while she sucked me off, and I spent right into her mouth, and she swallowed it all down like I was feeding her candy, and I knew what heaven was right then and there.

I wonder what ever happened to Susie. The last I heard, she was going to law school. She had to sue them just to get in. She was the smartest girl I ever knew. She got old, I suppose, just like we all do, if we don’t die trying.

The nurse—God I wish I could remember her name: Mary-Ann? Sue-Beth? Something hyphenated—is gently jacking me off. Her hand is strong and warm and professional, and it is moving up and down my cock just slowly enough to make me beg for more, just fast enough to keep the desire building. I grunt something, and she squeezes the shaft playfully before backing off to just a feather-grip. She wants to draw this out, make it last.

Mary, my wife, used to do this for me, back before we were even married. We did everything before we were married, of course. You had to be more careful back in those days, but nobody really was. Even so, we mostly just used our hands on each other. I wasn’t her first lay, but I was the first to ever bring her off, which always made me proud. She never liked to suck my cock, though I would go down on her for hours; and fucking was fun but routine, an old habit; but man that woman could give a handjob! Right there in church, or when I was driving us to town. ‘What’s that old man so happy about, driving down the road with a big fat smile on his face?’

Nurse is moving her hand faster now, deliberately. I can feel it coming, building up inside me. My heart is thumping in my chest. I wonder what the doctors would say. They found a tumor, a malignant growth on my pancreas, the size of the battleship Missouri. Inoperable, they said, as if I couldn’t have told them myself. Terminal. Tell me, what isn’t, when it all comes down to it?

She is playing with my balls, which never really did it for me, but I can’t bring myself to tell her that. Her hand is moving up and down my cock in a steady, sewing-machine rhythm. One finger explores down behind my ball sac, squirreling up in between my cheeks, pressing softly, questioningly up against my bunghole.

There was a boy in our unit who liked to take it up the ass. Fredrick, it was, or maybe Simon, I forget. It was supposed to be a secret, but we all gave it a go, deep down in the belly of the troop ship. It wasn’t like fucking a pussy; not better, not worse. Just different. In the dark it didn’t make no nevermind anyway. I was always curious to try it myself once, to trade places with him, but I never worked up the nerve to ask, and he bought his ticket home at Caen, courtesy of a sniper’s bullet. Now and again, Mary would ask me to do it to her that way, and when I did it I always thought of that poor kid; and how he always insisted he wasn’t really queer, and used to volunteer to walk point just to prove it; and I wondered who he left behind waiting for him.

The nurse is moving her hand fast now, steadily pushing me over the edge. “Let go, Mr. Holder, let it go…” For a fleeting moment I wonder if she does this for all the dying old men in her ward, or if I am somehow special, but then I do let it go and surrender to the rising tide of bliss.

It always feels, in some strange way, just like the first time. I finally give in to the insistent pumping of her hand, her finger worming its way up my ass, and at last I come, groaning and gasping like a horny teenage, squirting warm, sticky semen halfway up my belly. She prolongs it expertly, like she always does, milking every last drop of pleasure that’s left in my withered old body, making the moment seem like forever.

I wonder if she’s wet. I wonder if doing this turns her on, or if it’s merely an act of charity. I wish I could reciprocate, pull her to me, make her breath come in little gasps, make her whole body go rigid and then relax, but that is no longer my place. It would be presumptuous, unseemly. My breathing slowly returns to what passes for normal as she efficiently wipes up the mess with a wet warm towel.

I want to tell her ‘Thank you’. I want to ask her to tell my wife I love her, but Mary’s dead and gone now, isn’t she? Aren’t the women supposed to outlive the men? I never had the strength to be a widower. I don’t think she’d begrudge me this small pleasure, anyhow.

I wonder where my son is, and then I remember that he hasn’t spoken to me, for reasons I don’t understand, in decades. I want to see my granddaughter again, but she is dead too, torn to pieces by a roadside bomb in Iraq, my daughter-in-law phoning me up in the middle of the night to tell me the news in a low, shaky voice. Christ how I wept that night! I cursed George Bush up and down, swore I’d never vote Republican again as long as I lived. I never did, neither, for whatever that’s worth.

“Good night Mr. Holder,” the nurse says softly. “If you need anything, just buzz for me. Otherwise I’ll see you tomorrow night.”

I want to reach out and touch her, ask her to stay just a minute, tell her all these things before it’s too late, but I can already feel the sleep coming, washing over me like a tide, and before my mouth can form the words, I am gone.

END

Comments (5)

« Newer Posts · Older Posts »